Some genius walks among us. Whoever decided to film old people looking at Fleshlights for the first time is my spirit animal and I can only thank them for making the world a better place. Or at the very least, a place where you get to see your favorite sex toy in a whole new light. Basically, the people at All Def Digital took two adorable old ladies and three old men and made a video of old people discovering sex toys for the first time. And it's maybe the best thing I've ever seen.
Just like your sex education classes, men and women were kept separate and, just like your sex education classes, no one is mature about anything. Seriously, maybe even less mature than your sex ed class. There is giggling, there is aggressive fingering, there is everything you could ever hope for.
Although all of the participants are amazing, special shout out to "Honest John" (his actual name, according to him). Usually you only find an old man called Honest John wearing a tie dye t-shirt if he's your uncle's friend trying tell sell you oregano he swears is weed ("Would Honest John Lie to you!?"), but seeing him out of his natural habitat is all the more fun.
See how happy they are?
Here are my favorite moments:
1. This Is Honest John
You see this man? I would trust this man with my life. He explains the sex toys of yore: "For women, it was a stick. For men, it a was vacuum cleaner." I believe you, Honest John, I will always believe you.
2. "It's A Lady In There"
The "Lady Lager" packaging was initially baffling to these three naive souls.
3. "SEX IN A CAN!"
Rhonda, however, is no fool.
4. "That's what I thought, it's too short man."
Myles on the right kept complaining about the shortness of the can. We get it, Myles, you're a well-endowed fellow.
5. "Oh hey! That ain't bad."
Deloor was a fan. He said "You gotta get up in there." and then proceeded to do just that.
6. "Could you imagine taking this to people at the church?"
Rhonda and Joyce have plans afoot.
7. "People will just think you brought a drink with you and won't know what a pervy motherf*cker you are."
Honest John is a fountain of wisdom.
8. "I'm down with OP3- other people's plastic pussies."
And Deloor is a poet.
9. "That's a butthole."
Rhonda knew what was what for the second toy.
10. "I thought it was somebody who never had sex before."
Joyce did not, and Rhonda was unimpressed.
11. "He want that OG sh*t."
They were very into the third toy, modeled after an actual woman's vagina.
12. "Lisa Ann is making millions."
Yes she is.
13. "It was really educational."
In the end, Joyce and Rhonda had a lovely time. And the men clearly enjoyed it (I'm looking at you, Deloor).
More videos like this please.
Want more of Bustle's Sex and Relationships coverage? Watch us guess what these sex toys are:
Images: All Def Digital/YouTube