Entertainment

Prepare The Daggers For 'Vanderpump' Season 4

by Kristie Rohwedder

Do you remember where you were when you saw the trailer for the fourth season of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills spinoff Vanderpump Rules for the first time? Because I remember where I was: It was a Wednesday morning and I was lying in bed. As I groggily scrolled through Twitter, I saw a link to a Very Special Video: a preview for the new season of Vanderpump Rules . I shot up out of bed, grabbed my glasses, clicked the link, and watched. The video is a fount of exhilarating moments, but I did a literal double take when a certain ex-SURver popped up. Yes, Stassi Schroeder will be on Vanderpump Rules Season 4 after all.

Am I seeing things? I wondered. Is this because I haven’t ingested any coffee? Is this a prank? Is she really going to be on the show? I thought she said she was done? What is happening? Here is what was happening: Despite what she's said in the past, the wielder of violent metaphors will be on the next installment of the Bravo series. In a recent interview with Entertainment Tonight, Stassi confirms she has yet to quit Vanderpumping.

“I took a break and I did some soul searching and I thought, 'There are some reasons I want to come back again,'” Stassi tells ET. “And you’ll see them on the show.” AHHHHHHHHH!!!!! I am forever grateful for the "some reasons" that brought her back for round four.

“But it is so embarrassing that I was like, ‘No I’m definitely not,'" the Duchess of Contraband Mini Wine Bottles continues. "And then it’s like, ‘Yup, here I am.’”

Don't be embarrassed, Stassi. All is well that ends well. And as far as I'm concerned, this is definitely an "ends well" situation. Here are 22 of the thoughts that crossed my mind while I watched ET’s interview with Stassi Schroeder:

  1. Stassi said it! Stassi said she’ll be on the show!
  2. YES YES YES YES YES! PRAISE GIGGY THE POM!
  3. I can’t believe how great th— WAIT. What if this is a prank?
  4. Where’s Ashton Kutcher? Are we about to be Punk’d?
  5. Remember "Stassi’s Halloween Vander-Prank"?
  6. Remember her prank show one-off?
  7. Is this interview the sequel to that prank show one-off?
  8. Hm. I’ve got my guard up right now.
  9. Hm. It really doesn't appear to be a prank.
  10. She keeps saying we’ll see her on this season.
  11. OK, the video just ended and she never said “GOTCHA.”
  12. I think it’s safe to assume it is not a prank.
  13. THE SEASON 4 TRAILER DID NOT LIE.
  14. The Stassi scenes in the Season 4 trailer weren't a product of clever editing after all!
  15. The real prank: When Schroeds told the world she was dunzo with the show.
  16. Schroeds really pulled the statement necklace over our eyes, eh?
  17. I am so happy right now.
  18. My heart is so full.
  19. Cannot stop smiling.
  20. My face hurts from the smiling, but the pain is worth it.
  21. I cannot wait to see the Stassi/Jax conversation.
  22. I hope this show never ends.

*Bats eyelashes at the November 2 square on my wall calendar.* Can't wait to see you, Season 4.