If You Take "Baby, It's Cold Outside" Literally...

Christmas can be a magical time, full of wonder and decorations and the familiar sound of Christmas music — and then the whole mood is ruined by that creepy "Baby, It's Cold Outside" song. And to prove just how creepy the "Baby, It's Cold Outside" song is Funny Or Die decided to act it out. Spoiler alert: this song is terrible and why we play it anymore is beyond me.

For those who have remained blissfully ignorant of this unnerving winter ballad, the song is a duet between a woman who repeatedly insists she has to leave and a man who tries to convince her to stay for a variety of reasons, including the fact that "it's cold outside!" And although that premise is a little suspect to begin with — pressuring people to do things they're not comfortable with is really not my idea of romance — the song doubles down with disturbing lines like "What's in this drink?"

As plenty of people have pointed out, when the song as written in 1944, a time when women were expected to object to men's advances as a matter of course, it would most likely have been heard differently. Listeners back then probably would have understood the song as the woman wanting to stay while her partner gallantly offers her a list of cover stories for why she did. Nowadays, though, where grown women are thankfully allowed to decide for ourselves when we do and don't have sex, the song carries a completely different meaning.

However the writers might have intended it, the song is unspeakably creepy by any modern standard. Really, this is what it sounds like today (warning: it sounds a lot like date rape).

"I Really Can't Stay"

So far, so fine.

"Beautiful Please Don't Hurry"

He's being a little overly insistent. She's told him she wants to leave like six times.

"Put Some Music On While I Pour"

This, coupled with the "what's in this drink" line and this is pretty much all you can imagine.

"I Wish I Knew How To Break This Spell"

Pretty sure the "spell" is really a roofie.

"Baby, It's Cold Outside"

And by this point you're pretty sure she'd still be safer outside.

The Funny Or Die video has a happy ending in this case, but as it reminds us, this song is still completely messed up and inappropriate. Can we all just agree to stop playing it already? Or maybe we could swap it out for a more feminist version.

(Also, in case you're wondering: No, they haven't changed any of the original lyrics.)