8 '90s TV Show Bullies That Still Scare The Crap Out Of Every Millennial
I love absolutely love '90s televisions. And it is a fact — a 100 percent true fact — that '90s television was the best television that there has ever been. Because '90s television has it all: truly heartfelt life lessons, characters that mixed bright colors and patterns with wild abandon, and unbeatable cameos from pop stars — it was absolutely perfect. One more thing that '90s television has got on lock? The '90s bullies that still scare the living daylights out of me and every other millennial.
And I remember a lot of really good things from the '90s, like Mr. Feeny (aka, the greatest educator of the 20th century) and the ultimate #relationshipgoals of Patty Mayonnaise and Doug Funnie. But man, those '90s bullies? Yeah, 20-something years later, and I still do not like them.
I cannot exactly explain why these things still scare the crap out of me. It might take countless hours with a therapist to truly break down and understand the effect '90s television had on my tiny developing mind. But whenever I hear the names of some of these characters, a cool chill goes up my spine. In some ways that's super impressive (congrats, '90s television writers) in other ways that's like really sad.
Anyway. While I deal with that, here are the '90s television bullies that can still scare all millennials after all of these years:
Libby Chessler From Sabrina The Teenage Witch
There is literally nothing worse than a bully with lame comebacks and a superiority complex. And competing with your archenemy for the love and affection of your crush/future soulmate — total nightmare.
The Ashleys From Recess
Move over Regina George, the Ashleys were OG mean girl clique. After many years of dealing with mean girls, I have learned that they are the scariest thing on planet Earth. A group of mean girls with their own catchphrase? A 1000 times worse.
Roger Klotz From Doug
I have now realized that I have a habit of dating Rogers (read: tortured artists who cannot properly express their feelings). It's best to avoid guys like Roger at all costs.
"Endless" Mike From Pete And Pete
Remember when Mike with the rest of Pumpkin Eaters try to destroy Halloween? What an a-hole.
Kanker Sisters From Ed, Edd 'n' Eddy
Peach Creek was filled with many interesting people (anyone remember Plank?) but the Kanker Sister were in a class all their own when it came to bullying. They were triple the trouble and triple the bad haircuts.
Angelica Pickles From The Rugrats
I have many fears as a semi-adult, having a child like Angelica ranks near the top. This chick still haunts me.
Helga G. Pataki From Hey, Arnold!
A child who keeps a replica of their school crush and only expresses their feelings through violence is not an adult I ever wish to meet. Wondering the kind of adult Helga would become has kept me up at night.
The Temple Guards From Legends Of The Hidden Temple
While not technically bullies, the Temple Guards a total menaces. Full grown men who hide in dark places and grab unsuspecting children? Yeah, I still fear the Temple Guards to this day.
If you need me I'll be in a corner crying my eyes out and trying to forget that Helga from Hey, Arnold! ever existed.
Images: Walt Disney Television; Giphy (8)