Let’s just make one thing really clear first and foremost: sex is awkward, no matter how long you’ve been doing it. Granted, it’s definitely one of those things that gets better with practice but any time you’re taking two or more naked bodies, throwing in a range of bodily fluids, and squishing it all together, there is serious potential for awkwardness. Add in the fact that most of us are, well, usually not exactly totally in control of our bodies when we’re doing it and you can bet that any sexual active adult has at least one awkward sex story under their belt.
Queefs. Vomiting. Ill-aimed ejaculate. The potential for the human body to be unsexy during sexy times is so infinite that I’m honestly surprised we’re ever able to do it without something awkward happening. I think especially in the early years of our sexual lives, however, people are way more likely do something hella embarrassing.
My personal favorite awkward sex story is from my single days. I'd spent a very nice evening with a quirky, cute photographer and things had finally progressed to the make-out stage. We were kissing in the dark of his bedroom and I realized pretty quickly that he was the worst kisser ever. Like, slobbering all over my face bad. My mouth and nose were soon drenched with dribble — or so I thought. It wasn't until we shifted into a little bit of light from the door that I realized that at least some of that drool was blood. I'd gotten a bloody nose mid-makeout and we both looked like zombies after a particularly delicious meal. Needless to say, we didn't have a second date.
Cringe, right? We've all been there, and it's nothing to feel ashamed about. And, as you'll see below, these stories are just something to laugh about later on. So check out these awkward sex stories from the sexual histories of reddit users.
1. Vagina Raspberry
2. Not A Towel...
3. Fellatio Vomitus
4. Condom Fart
5. Here Baby, Let Me Just Add Lube... OH MY GOD NO!!
7. BBQ Penis
8. Dribble, Dribble...
9. Is That A Nosebleed Or Are You Just Happy To See Me?
10. 13. Body Farts
11. Coitus Interruptus
13. Pulled Over
14. Ejaculate Volcano
15. Out The Nose
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