No matter how old you are when you lose your virginity,
it’s always, um, interesting, to say the least. It doesn't matter how many movies you
watch or how many times you flip through the Kama Sutra, you’re never really
quite prepared for your first time. Which isn’t a bad thing! Some of the best
parts about experiencing a “first” is not being totally prepared for it and being taken by surprise.
According to virginity stats, because yes such things exist, the average American will lose their virginity when they’re 17. Of course there are those who will lose it before then and those who will lose it later on, but the majority of people lose their virginity in their teens, with only five percent of both men and women, between the ages of 25 and 29, still being virgins in that age bracket. That percentage continues to drop with age, and by the time people have reached 40, the percentage of those who are still virgins between 40 and 44 is a very minute 0.3 percent.
But whether you lose your virginity at 15 or lose it at 35, there are fun and hard truths that come with it, and here are seven of them. But first, check out our video on sex positions for small penises:
1. Fun Truth: It’s Really Exciting
Those moments right before you do it for the first time, when you know it’s about to happen, are really exciting! You’re a bit nervous, a bit unsure, really turned on, and you just feel like your head might explode from all the excitement.
2. Hard Truth: It Tends To Be Awkward
The reason your first time is awkward is for the same reason that it’s exciting — it’s totally new. If your partner isn’t a virgin, but you are, then you’re less likely to deal with the awkwardness that two virgins will experience together. I mean, just trying to figure out how to do sex positions, when you’re both virgins, can be tricky. Even people who have been having sex for years sometimes have to finagle during certain positions.
3. Hard Truth: It’s May Not Feel So Great
I would never say that it doesn’t feel good at all during a woman’s first time, because I can’t speak for all woman. In my personally experience, it felt weird and foreign; a pressure that I wasn’t sure was good or bad. I also have other friends who liked the way it felt, but agreed that it felt a bit out of place. If you're having penis-in-vagina sex, it’s your vagina’s first introduction to a penis, unless you’ve been using dildos during masturbation, so it’s bound to feel not as great as it may for a man. But once you have a few practice rounds, it gets much better.
4. Fun Truth: It’s Not Like It Is In The Movies
First of all, far too many movies center around men losing their virginities instead of women which, in itself, is a problem — American Pie and The 40-Year-Old Virgin, to name two off the top of my head. Secondly, when they do show someone losing their virginity, the guy always climaxes in 2.2 seconds and the girl bleeds because her hymen has been busted wide open! Nope. Good news: It’s not like that. At all.
5. Hard Truth: It’s Not Like It Is In The Movies
In contrast, for those movies that paint virginity loss like this amazing epic thing, as it’s done in The Notebook, it’s definitely not like that either. In fact, it’s just best to throw away any pre-conceived notions you have about losing your virginity based on movies, right out the window.
6. Fun Truth: It Can Make You Feel Closer To Your Partner
Whether only one of you are virgins or you both are, sharing such an intimate thing can make you both feel even closer to each other. You never forget the first person you have sex with, just like you never forget your first love, so you’ll always have that shared experience.
7. Hard Truth: It Can Change Your Relationship
Although losing your virginity can make things a little weird at first for all virgins, if you’re both virgins, then you have double the weird. Not weird in a bad way, but it just shifts the dynamic of the relationship a bit. You’ve gone from not having a sex life to having a sex life. It’s a change for you personally and for your relationship, so you find yourself wondering how to handle it. Should we have sex all the time now? Do we do it every time we’re together? Is it OK if I’m not in the mood? Basically, it just brings up a lot of questions, but questions that can be answered by talking to your partner.
Images: Andrew Zaeh/Bustle; Giphy (8)