The Best "When Having Sex Don't Say" Tweets Are A Reminder Of Dirty Talk Gone Wrong, So Wrong
When it comes to what people say during sex, things can get awkward. If you’re not on the same page, sexually speaking, as your partner, what you think is sexy dirty talk, may be terrifying or even straight up strange to them. While it’s normal to express your desires, give direction, or even accidentally call out the wrong name (hey, it happens to the best of us!), some things should just be off limits completely.
While talking during sex isn’t a bad thing, sometimes what you say during sex can kill the mood, if you’re not careful. For example, all the times I’ve said to my partner, “I’m claiming the last slice of pizza right now,” as he’s going down on me is, from what I’ve gathered, something one shouldn’t say during sex. But when you know there’s only one slice left and you’re concerned about losing it, it’s important to call dibs. At least in my mind. So I won’t apologize for it.
And today, the #WhenHavingSexDontSay hashtag, is the star of Twitter, as people are listing off all the things one should never say during sex. Although there were hundreds of tweets to choose from, as is always the case when a hashtag takes off, here are 19 tweets that will definitely make you chuckle… and maybe even drop your face in your palms and mutter, “Ooops.”
So just don't...
1. Mention Mr. Belvedere (Or His Balls)
2. Or Scarface, For That Matter
3. Politics, Politics, Politics
4. Suggest You Just Might Be Faking It (A Bit)
5. Ask Someone To Take A Survey About Your Ability
6. Make Comparisons... To Family Members
7. Suddenly Let Your Curiosity Get The Best Of You
8. Quote Shakespeare (It's Not As Impressive As You Think)
9. Unleash Your Inner Gordon Ramsay
10. Discuss Twitter (Like Ever)
11. Sing Commercial Tag Lines
12. Reference Mean Girls (Although, It Would Kind Of Be Awesome)
13. Ask For LinkedIn Endorsements
14. Quote TV Lawsuits
15. Mention Facebook (Even If You Want To Update Your Status About The Sex You're Having)
16. Bring Up Random Scientific Facts
17. Quote '80s Commercials
18. Get All Dark And Creepy
19. Ask What You Actually Might Really Be Thinking
How much better do you feel about your awkward sex moment now?
Images: Ashley Batz for Bustle; Twitter