Entertainment

Everything You Gotta Know About the New 'Bachelor'

by Lindsay Mannering

After that horribly sad and totally depressing Bachelorette finale, we were treated to an even more confusing After the Final Rose, where Desiree Hartsock and Chris Siegfried pretended to be in love, where Brooks Forester pretended he didn't know how lucky he was to have left the show, and Chris Harrison pretended to be excited for the newly engaged couple. The only happy moment on the Bachelorette's three hour television event last night was the reveal that Juan Pablo Galavis will be the next Bachelor . Women (or were they tweens? I couldn't tell) went wild in the audience when the camera panned up to show that the next man who intends to wife-up on national TV will be the Venezuelan soccer player with the adorable daughter.

But, as Harrison pointed out, Juan Pablo didn't have much screen time on Des's season. In fact, the only memorable part about him was his exit, during which he revealed he was a father, which came as a surprise. Other than that, he was just one of the many ridiculously good looking dudes with a seemingly effortless six pack who hung out in the background, half interested in Des, half interested in their on-camera persona.

So just who is this Juan Pablo? Here's everything we know about our next Bachelor:

The Basics

  • He's 5'11", has an 11.5 shoe size' (because yes, ABC asked). He's got light-brown hair and green eyes.
  • Born in Ithaca, New York, he moved to Barquisimeto, Venezuela, the fourth largest city in the country, when he was two.
  • He returned to New York to attend Roberts Wesleyan College in North Chili, where he played soccer and is still the third all-time assists leader.
  • J.P. played professional soccer in Venezuela and Italy after graduation, and in 2008, he began playing for the second-tier professional team, Miami FC, in Fort Lauderdale, Florida. He stopped playing after the birth of his daughter Camilla, because he didn't want to travel.
  • His soccer career over, he began to promote clubs and bars in the Miami scene, became involved in the music scene, and got a Venezuelan group a record deal with Universal Music Latin. He also had some gigs in commercials, and appeared on a few Miami-based sports shows.

The Good

  • He's got ambition — in five years, he'd like to be "one of the most respected agents in sports and music."
  • He's romantic — he likes to "always keep the person smiling, even with a text message, a picture, or a little note hidden somewhere. I like to give surprises." As long as one of those surprises isn't a dick pic, we're all in.
  • He's down to earth. Juan Pablo's described himself as laid back, and he wants the same in a lady. When asked to describe his ideal mate, he wrote: "Easy going, fun, not too worried about fancy brands, outgoing that gets along with people from different cultures, that doesn't get upset with jokes." Sounds like our kind of guy! It also sounds like he's been burned by a gold digger — that "fancy brand" call-out is a little, uh, specific.
  • He told Chris Harrison that he has a great relationship with his daughter's mother — a positive if ever there was one.
  • A spokesperson for ABC confirmed J.P. will be the first non-Caucasian Bachelor or Bachelorette in franchise history. He'll undoubtedly bring some much needed diversity to the show, which has been criticized for being too homogenous.

The "Bad"

  • There's a chance our J.P. could be somewhat of a womanizer. He said his ideal mate has a "fit body, good-size breasts, and a nice smile." Not sure whether or not to deducted him a point for that response, or give him one, because on the one hand, dude, come on. And on the other, it takes a lot of courage to be that honest, and honesty is the best policy, so ...
  • His longest relationship was during college ... which was 12 years ago. Again, it's not necessarily a bad thing, but it could be a red flag. (Des, if you're reading this, a "red flag" is a bad sign. Ever heard of it?)
  • When asked what his favorite book was, Juan Pablo responded with a cool, "don't read." It's a statement as much as it is a command, and it's just the littlest bit worriesome.

The Confusing

  • The Bachelorette questionnaire asked, "Meatloaf said he would 'do anything for love, but he won't do that.' What will you not do?" And just what did our Juan Pablo answer? HE LEFT IT BLANK. He's a mystery wrapped in an enigma. Prediction: one of the women will bring this up in their first meeting when she steps out of the limo.
  • Everything seems to go his way. The big Bachelor reveal last night happened to coincide with his 32nd birthday. How perfect is that?! I have a feeling things always work out for this guy, and that's confusing.
  • He loves himself a selfie. Nearly his entire Instagram feed is clogged with the omnipresent selfie, and it's a little bizarre. Does he really love himself that much? And if he does, can we blame him?
  • He's already making friends in Hollywood — a Twitter exchange with Jason Biggs makes us think the actor will show up to help J.P. find a lady. Just, if Biggs does make a guest appearance, please, no rapping in driveways, OK, guys?