Jon Snow Should Not Be King

If you're a Game of Thrones fan, you've probably heard about the parentage theory. It's confusing as hell and probably makes your brain hurt, but in short, it's this: Jon Snow is the son of Rhaegar Targaryen and Lyanna Stark (he's not Ned's son — ugh, we do know nothing). The reason Lyanna handed Jon off to Ned — according to ASOIAF fans, of course — is because King Robert Baratheon might have considered him to be a threat to the crown. Apparently, Baby Jon Snow packed a power punch. Further, he'd be Daenerys' nephew, and a viable, potential king when the books and show come to a close.

Sound cool? Eh, think again. While it would be cool to see the bastard who knows nothing become the King, it also would be king of disappointing. Because for all of Jon Snow's perfectly coiffed hair and his chiseled facial features... he's not the most exciting character on Game of Thrones.

Fortunately, we've begun to see some of that usual gloomy Snow fare change. The Battle of Castle Black proved that he not only knew how to work it with a sword, but that he also is a pretty fearless individual. We've seen him slowly become more and more exciting as he's come into his own. You, go, Jon Snow! Now go sing "I'll Make A Man Out of You" from Mulan or something.

But Jon Snow's usual lack of excitement and witticisms — he'll never be Oberyn (RIP!), Tyrion, or even the lovable Samwell Tarley, for that matter — isn't the only problem. Our brooding emo stud could potentially, according to this theory, swoop in and become the hero when it has seemed like somebody else was on a slow-burning journey to acquire the crown. That "somebody else" also happens to be a lady-person who is literally packin' fire in her pockets with her three dragons — Danaerys Targaryen.

Now, Dany's story has kind of sucked this season — she hasn't moved from Mereen, and she pretty much has done nothing but make Braveheart-esque speeches to her people. However, there still is one thing that she's definitely been doing as she stays planted in Mereen: she's been learning how to rule.

So much of Game of Thrones is about people aggressively trying to ascend to power without actually ruling, and Dany, while seemingly not climbing up the Westeros power tower, is exercising her abilities as Queen, which is potentially priming her to take the Iron Throne. Another plausible reason that she hasn't done much this season? If the series ends with Dany assuming the throne, then we've got to hold out for another four seasons. She — and the showrunners and George R. R. Martin — might be stalling. (That's no matter for Dany. In the interim, she's getting it on with Daario Numero Dos.)

So if Daenarys — who's a Targaryen, and technically the rightful heir to the throne if we go way, way back — was going to be Queen by the time all of this madness in Westeros is said and done, and then Jon Snow swooped in with his hair.... wouldn't that be really disappointing? We've been so lucky to see women kick ass on Game of Thrones , and it would be even cooler to see a woman take the throne at the end of it all, throwing any sexist tropes in Westeros on their heads. Having a dude take the throne after all of these lady-driven moves would be sort of... anti-climactic. It would certainly be a kick in the face to feminism.

Of course, this is all just talk, as George R. R. Martin hasn't even finished writing the books. There's ample time for this theory to be disproven. And you know, there's always that other classic Game of Thrones option — all of our favorite heroes could die.

As always, just like Jon Snow, I know (mostly) nothing. But I do know one thing: it would be pretty damn cool to see a woman ultimately sit on the Iron Throne.

Image: HBO; Giphy (2)