Life

These Ain't Your Grandma's Emojis

Clemens Bilan/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images

For those who feel a little limited by the Unicode emojis that come standard with most smart devices these days, good news: There are loads of alternatives out there, with more coming along every day. And hey, if you’ve ever wished you had the ability to, I don’t know, express how weird you felt when that dude at the bar spent the entire evening staring at your rack, you can. An Texticle, a new app, puts a whole set of “adult,” incredibly NSFW emojis at your fingertips.

I can’t say that emoji boobs were something I was absolutely dying to see, but, well… too late.

Not going to lie: Part of me saw the emojis offered and thought, “RIP, society.” Then again, we’re talking about emojis here, so… do with that what you will. I do have to say, though, that I kind of love the fact that Texticle has just about every warning possible on its iTunes App Store pages, including but not limited to:

  • Frequent/intense profanity or crude humor
  • Frequent/intense sexual content or nudity
  • Infrequent/mild cartoon or fantasy violence
  • And the fact that you must be at least 17 years old to download the app.

Alas, it’s not free, which means I wasn’t able to test it out; my general rule of thumb when it comes to hilarious apps is that if it’s free, I’ll try it, but if it’s not, I’m not blowing my money on it. From what I can tell from the reviews, though, it functions similarly to iDiversicons when it comes to how it’s used: In order to insert its naughty, naughty images into your texts, emails, or Facebook posts, you have to open the app, select the one you want to use, copy it, and paste it in the message field.

Anyone with Texticle want to volunteer themselves as a guinea pig for some emojinalysis? I’d love to see what Dan Brill would make of someone’s most frequently used Texticle emojis. Weed, middle fingers, and bikini-clad breasts must make one helluva statement.

Also, don't text and drive. That's just dumb.

Images: Texticle/iTunes App Store