Like the spoopy creppy holiday it is, All Hallow’s Eve has snuck up on us yet again. [Stares into staticky television set.] It's heeeeeeere! Well, it's almost here. You know what that means? GET YOUR COSTUMES ON LOCK, DUH. ...OK, OK, to be honest, I am not one to be throwing out orders like that. Because it's been years since I've had a Halloween 'stume on lock. But I want to break the habit. I want to commit to Halloween. So this year, I am going to wear a costume while I watch Hocus Pocus and hand out candy to trick-or-treaters. And I'm going to go big. I'm going to look to one of my favorite eras of music and let it inspire my costume. That's right: I am going to dress up as one of the reigning ladies of early aughts pop music.
When in doubt, pop culture is always an endless fount of costume ideas. There are so many pop culture-inspired costume options to choose from: A Kardashian sister! A '90s boy bander! Zenon! Any of the women crushing the Top 40 chart in the early 2000s!
I've yet to decide which '00s pop star I'm going to be for Halloween. There are just too many good choices. And now I will share my 'stume ideas with you. Ya know, just in case you'd like to take it back to The New Millennium on Oct. 31, too:
SO MANY ICONIC LOOKS, SO MANY CHOICES. You could go with the “Oops!… I Did It Again” red catsuit. Or, you could wear a green bikini, attach a blue cape to your waistband, and drape a giant toy snake around your shoulders, ’01 VMAs-style.
If you’re feeling extra adventurous, buy a bodysuit that matches your skin tone. Then, glue gems, glitter, and scraps of tinfoil onto the bodysuit. You’re the “Toxic” music video! When people ask if you’re supposed to be Britney from the VMAs, give them a judgy look and correct them.
Toss on a white halter crop top, a pair of white bootcut pants, a belly chain, and some big silver hoops. The most crucial detail: comb reddish-purple streaks in your hair.
Wear brown pants, a brown halter, leather jewelry, and a silver belt. Give your hair some curls and waves. Bonus points if you carry a toy horse around.
Perhaps you like to err on the side of chill when it comes to assembling a costume. Fear not, for you can still dress up like a '00s pop princess. Wear a blonde wig, some frosted lip gloss, a white T-shirt, and some black sweatpants. Hold a can of Chicken of the Sea tuna. BAM. You’re Newlyweds J-Simps.
I’m torn. You could go with the “Candy” music video: Grab a yellow tank top and a long turquoise skirt, style your hair in that very early aughts updo, and get your mitts on a portable CD player.
OR! You could pull your hair back in a ponytail, curl your bangs, and wear a pair of denim overalls over a button-down shirt. You're her character from A Walk To Remember!
If you are a whiz with a sewing machine, get some leaf-print silk chiffon and make a replica of that Versace gown J. Lo wore to the 2002 Grammys.
Not the craftiest cat? Wear an off-white tank, some cargo capris, and a white knit cab driver hat. You're still "Jenny From the Block."
You need two (or three, depending on which DC lineup you choose to go with) friends to properly execute this costume. The key: Whatever you wear, make sure everyone COORDINATES. Make Tina Knowles proud.