9 Times Usher Should Have Punched Justin Bieber in the Chest
Besides all of his sex jams, I guess we can thank Usher for giving us... Justin Bieber. Lest ye forget that the little troublemaker was discovered by Usher on Youtube when he was just a young buck. But more recently, the Biebs has had a tough couple of years in which he's just gone totally off the rails. So what does his mentor Usher have to say about all of Bieber's bad behavior? He told Billboard Magazine: "I try my hardest to give as much positive reinforcement as I can. I'll punch him in the f---ing chest when I need to, and give him a hug and kiss when I need to." Well, that's sweet, I suppose.
Obviously Usher is biased in his unequivocal forgiveness of baby Bieber. He went on to say that he "loves the kid" and "I can say I'm not happy with all the choices my friend has made, but I'm supportive of him. He's making his own decisions and it's important to show support." Haven't you ever heard that you've gotta be cruel to be kind, Usher? Sure, punching him in the effing chest might teach him a lesson but perhaps not if you're turning right around and smooching him and telling him everything's gonna be OK. 'Cause things might not be OK for Bieb, who's faced some serious stuff including jail time.
I assume that upon each criminal act Usher shamefully shakes his head in disappointment while punching his little buddy, but here are some more minor Bieber offenses that should have warranted the same kind of lecturing from his mentor. You brought him into this world, Usher, so keeping him in line is your responsibility.
Covering Meghan Trainor's "All About That Bass"
Usher might not be able to sway Biebs with regards to his morality, but he definitely should have an influence on his musical choices. Why, then, would Bieber make this bizarre and unnecessary remix of Meghan Trainor's "All About That Bass?" Punch to the chest from Usher.
Punching a Paparazzo in Paris
It was certainly not the first time that Bieber got in a scuffle with a photographer (that's putting it lightly), but he seems like he'll never learn his lesson. His most recent tussle was international, allegedly punching a paparazzo in Paris. He deserves an Usher punch for his Paris punch.
Stripping at a Concert
Bieber's affinity to take his shirt off is something I am directly and wholly blaming Usher for, who is the King of Not Wearing a Shirt. This is cool if you're Usher Raymond, a freakishly sexual being with mad moves. But Bieber is obviously not of the same caliber, and I'm sure Usher got total second-hand embarrassment when Bieber stripped at Fashion Rocks to quell the audience's boos. Punch to the effing chest.
An Animorph You Ain't
Biebs needs some serious editorial help on his Instagram account. Here's a particularly awful photo: Bieber probably spent time and money to pay someone to make this Animorph-style photo of himself turning into a tiger. Into... a tiger. That is offensive to tigers. An Usher punch to the chest. (OK, fine, maybe a fan just sent the pic to him.)
His Native American Tattoo
Bieber's ink in general is pretty lol, but his tattoo of a Native American chief on his back (which he apparently got in honor of his grandpa, who was NOT Native American but loved to take Bieber to Stratford Cullitons games — an Ontario hockey team whose mascot is the chief) is not. Bad tattoos? OK. Cultural appropriating ones? Warrants an Usher punch.
Using a Wheelchair as a Fast Pass
Though he CLAIMS that he was using the wheelchair at Disneyland because of a "knee injury," it seemed suspiciously like Bieber was using a wheelchair at the theme park to cut in line. Tacky! Ableist! Stupid! Usher punch!
Egging Him On
In his dumbest arrest, Justin Bieber egged his neighbor's house. That's even a good prank anymore. Usher would punch him in the effing chest purely for his lack of originality.
Nude Selfies? No Thanks
My god, man. REEL IT IN. Like I said, Usher Raymond is a grown ass man and he's earned his keep as a sex god. U r a bb, you should not be posting dangerous X-rated pics. Usher would punch.
Bieber wore a bucket hat to Coachella.... ABSOLUTELY, ENTIRELY, UNEQUIVOCALLY UNACCEPTABLE. A million Usher punches to the chest!
Images: Getty Images, Giphy (9).