Gwyneth Paltrow's Mom Doesn’t Get “Conscious Uncoupling” & That Can’t Be Their Only Misunderstanding
If you feel like a lesser person because sometimes you have no idea what a celebrity is talking about... don't. You know why? Well, how about the fact that Blythe Danner doesn't understand Gwyneth Paltrow — her very own daughter. In an interview with Page Six, Danner revealed she (like everyone else in the world) doesn't get "conscious uncoupling." All hail mama Paltrow! After being asked how her daughter is, Danner said,
Wonderful. People make fun of this, um, what do they call it? What is that thing that they’ve been doing? Separating, but being?
Page Six reminded the actress of those two famous words, to which Danner replied,
Yes, but it’s called "conscious" . . . not "conscious uncoupling." Conscious …
The publication said, yes, that's what it is indeed called, but Danner inevitably gave up on trying to get the confusing phrase right. Eventually, she said,
They are so smart... both incredibly brilliant. They’re making it work, they’re great friends and the kids are in wonderful shape. So I have to take my hat off to both of them.
Ever since Paltrow and Chris Martin split, we've been left to decipher exactly what they meant by that philosophical separation, or whatever we're supposed to call it. Thank goodness we have Danner in our corner.
Now, you know what all this means? That it's time to list off a few other things Danner would probably be confused by, because let's face it, Paltrow is sometimes downright confusing.
Paltrow Steaming Her Vagina
Remember that time the actress revealed she steams her lady parts? Yeah, Danner probably wants to forget about it.
What the heck does Paltrow's website stand for? According to Paltrow, it's a nickname, like hers is "G.P." It can be "a word that means nothing and could mean anything." Huh?
Her Feud With Martha Stewart
Can't we all just get along, Martha and Gwyneth?
Gwyneth's "Sex Bark"
Eat it in the morning. Eat it in the afternoon. Eat it in the evening. Eat it in bed. Eat it whenever and wherever and you're sure to improve your sex life. OK, Gwyneth. OK.
Finally, This Quote
“I would rather die than let my kid eat Cup-a-Soup.” Justin disagrees, Gwyneth. And your mother is probably confused.