According to a new study, men aren’t intimidated by your sex toy after all, ladies. Once upon a time it was thought that the mere mention of a vibrator or dildo in the presence of your guy would send him into a panicked frenzy of jealousy or feelings of inadequacy, but things are different now. These days, if anything, men are excited to have a little help in the bedroom, and whipping out a sex toy (or two or three) does exactly that.
The study conducted by the University of Guelph in Ontario surveyed 49 men in heterosexual relationships, all between the ages of 25 and 38, to see just how they feel about a sex toy being introduced to the sexy time equation with their partner. What it found was that not only are most men not intimidated at all, but they welcome the sex toys with open arms. Having help from a battery-operated gadget can actually create greater feelings of intimacy for men, co-author of the study, Erin Watson, told Mic.
Sex toys are no longer the awkward third wheel in the bedroom, but rather the ideal component to a very happy threesome. Hear, hear!
Now that we know guys aren’t intimidated or even remotely threatened by our buzzing and vibrating BFFs, let’s kick some other sex toy misconceptions to the curb.
1. Sex Toys Are Just For Masturbating Solo
Hardly. A 2009 study by Indiana University found that the majority of couples use sex toys during sex. According to the research, 81 percent of women and 91 percent of men who had used a vibrator at some point in their sex life had done so with their partner.
2. Vibrators Are Only For Women
The 2009 study also found that not only had 53 percent of women used a vibrator, but so had 50 percent of men. Sure, they’re "only for women" until you suggest your partner put a vibrator against his balls the next time he masturbates and he feels like he was born again.
3. Sex Toys Are Only For Single Ladies
Actually, nothing could be further from the truth. As the Indiana University study found, married women use vibrators far more than single women. While less than a third of single women (29 percent) use them, 50 percent of married women do.
According to, Sandor Gardos, the founder of MyPleasure.com, his “typical” customer is a “woman in her late 30s to late 40s, married with children at home.”
4. Sex Toys Can Ruin Your Sex Life
As we learned from Charlotte in Sex in the City, while one can become a wee bit addicted to their vibrator, it definitely will not ruin your sex life. According the Kinsey Institute, women who use vibrators have better sex lives and are more likely to take care of their sexual health by visiting their gynecologist more often.
5. Overuse Of Vibrators Will Make You Numb
Well, if that were the case, women everywhere would have some pretty numbed out vaginal areas.
But let’s be honest, if you overdo anything, you’re liable to get yourself into a not-so-great feeling predicament. According to the Indiana University survey, 11 percent of women experienced “occasional numbness” from their vibrator use, but only three percent felt it frequently. If that’s the case, ease up on the pressure and maybe cut your vibrator use back to only a couple hours a day instead of five.
6. Only Younger Women Use Sex Toys
While it may feel like sex toys are mostly marketed toward younger generations with their fancy buttons and loud colors, almost 50 percent (46.3 percent to be exact) of women between 45 and 60 have used a vibrator. In contrast, 59.5 percent of women between 23 and 44, the age group with the highest percentage, have used them.
7. When A Woman Needs A Sex Toy It’s Because Her Partner Is Lacking In Bed
The vagina is tricky! It doesn’t come with a manual, things are all tucked up inside and hidden, and for some, even trying to find their G-spot or get the most out of clitoral stimulation can be a task. If it’s that way for a woman and her own body, can you imagine what it’s like for a partner? Doubly tricky!
In no way, shape, or form, does sex toy use mean that a woman’s partner is bad in bed. It just reinforces that female sexuality is complicated, and a woman’s partner, even if they're the most fantastic lay in the world, can always use a little help.
If you'd like to take a trip down memory lane, watch the sex myths you believed as a child below (and subscribe to Bustle's YouTube page for more videos):
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Images: Curtis MacNewton/Flickr; Giphy(7)
