11 Essential Qualities In Couples That Last, According To Matchmakers

Andrew Zaeh for Bustle

When it comes to dating and relationships, you may want to know the secret formula in how to go from casually dating someone to becoming a serious couple. After all, things can start out well, but then the relationship turns out to not have the staying power. But what differentiates one couple from the next? As you can imagine, this may vary from couple-to-couple, yet many experts agree there are also certain traits that lasting couples have in common.

Stef Safran, matchmaking and dating expert, says there are some traits are more typical among couples who will last than others — and they may not be the ones you're looking out for on a first date. “Height, hair, and even location aren’t qualities that make a relationship work long-term,” she tells Bustle. “Finding out that you trust a person and that they are available and want to be with you are things that build attraction. Don’t mistake instant chemistry with long-term compatibility.”

So, if you are looking for a secret formula, so to speak, on how long-lasting couples do it, there are several traits, from communicating well to showing their appreciation, they have in common. Here are 11 qualities in couples that last, from the professionals who know them best: matchmakers.