I always thought orgasms felt great, but after watching porn and observing partners, I got the feeling that they were experiencing something more intense than me. I wondered if I was having bad orgasms, as if there’s such a thing. Then, I realized: Comparing your sex life to someone else’s is comparing apples and oranges. There's no one right way to have sex, and as long as you're enjoying yourself and everything's consensual, there's no wrong way, either.
"Although it's understandable to want to compare your sex life or your relationship to those of other people, you may wind up getting an inaccurate, unfavorable, unrealistic picture of yourself or your relationship," practicing psychologist and Harvard lecturer Holly Parker, PhD, author of If We're Together, Why Do I Feel So Alone?, tells Bustle. "What’s most important is to listen to yourself in deciding whether you’re happy in your relationship or sex life. And if you’re looking for more information to help guide you in deciding whether an aspect of your relationship or sex life is “normal” or healthy, see if you can find information from sources that are credible — e.g. your doctor, therapist, relationship or sex expert, or scientifically supported readings."
Here are a few areas of your sex life where there is no normal and all variations are totally fine.