Finding a deeply intense connection with someone isn't easy. So when you do find that, it's hard to let them go. That's why
breaking up with a soulmate can sometimes feel like the end of the world. But according to experts, letting go may be just the thing you need to do. When you break up with a soulmate, there are some pretty unexpected things that can happen in your life.
"The rumor is that everyone has just one soulmate," relationship expert and spiritual counselor,
Davida Rappaport, tells Bustle. "But we don’t have just one soulmate. We have many soulmates."
According to her, a soulmate is someone that you're connected to on a "very deep, spiritual level." Every single one of them has a purpose in our lives. In some way, they're meant to help us to grow as individuals on a mental, physical, emotional and soul level. Although you may feel a special connection to someone that's unexplainable, you do have the choice to be a part of each other's lives or not.
With that said, it's important to note that
breaking up with a soulmate is possible. As romantic as it may seem, finding your soulmate isn't a guarantee that you're going to be together forever. But that doesn't mean your love life is doomed if things don't work out. If someone is your soulmate, experts say, here are some unexpected things that can happen if you break up.
You May Gain A Greater Sense Of Self-Awareness
"Most people get the best lessons in life after going through difficult experiences, and breaking up with a soulmate is no exception," author and counselor,
Connie Omari, LPC, tells Bustle. Breakups are "powerful." Most if not all, will teach you something about yourself and what you actually want. The best part is, you can benefit from the breakup by taking those lessons and implementing change, she says. In doing so, you'll be more prepared when you enter into relationship with someone else.
You May Find A Way To Reconcile
Cutting a soulmate off completely will be a huge challenge and you may find yourself in an
on-again and off-again situation because of that. "You may not be able to detach from them completely because you connected to them so deeply on a spiritual and/or soul level," Rappaport says. If you're someone who believes that you only have one soulmate, you'll do your best to keep trying to make things work until things really run its course. Keep in mind however, that finding ways to get back together over and over again won't guarantee that you'll actually end up together forever.
Some People You Try To Date After May Feel "Wrong"
After you end things with a soulmate, you're going to keep chasing that deep kind of connection until you find it again. Unfortunately, that may not be the easiest thing to do. According to Rappaport, you may try to put yourself out there but some of the people you try to date after will feel "wrong." You may even write off great matches just because they don't give you that soulmate feeling. "In this case, you should probably take a time out until you are able to realize you don’t need to have a 'soulmate,' just a good partner the next time around," she says.
You May Become Best Friends
Breaking up with a soulmate isn't all bad. In fact, one surprising thing that can happen when you break up with a soulmate is you may find that you both no longer belong together as partners, Rappaport says. Once you've both had time to heal, your soulmate could end up being one of your closest friends. "You may always have a special connection," she says. "If you both are willing to stay connected rather than terminate or hurt each other, you both may continue to grow with each other as a support team."
You May Find That Change Is A Lot Less Scary
Ending things with someone you felt an intense connection with can be one of the hardest things you may have to deal with in your life. "But once we go through the emotional mangle, and lose the hardest thing, change becomes less scary," Amica Graber, relationship expert with
TruthFinder, tells Bustle. You may be tempted to move, travel by yourself, or quit your job to find something more fulfilling. "These 'big' changes will feel far less consequential after going through the biggest change of all," she says.
You May Feel Lighter And More Energized Than Ever Before
"After you break up with a soulmate, you may actually feel a bit lighter and more energized," Rappaport says. "Sometimes the karma that connected you to your soulmate was the only thing that bound you both together." This may not happen right away. You may even get back together and break up a few times before you allow yourself to fully move on. But when you do, you may find that your soulmate has actually been weighing you down this entire time.
Breakups give you an amazing opportunity to hit the reset button on your life, matchmaker
Tammy Shaklee, tells Bustle. When you have the courage to let go of a connection you thought was going to be forever, you have the opportunity to start all over again. According to Shaklee, breaking up with a soulmate will give you a chance to "re-engage your spirit and your soul." Doing things that you once loved or trying new things that you've always been curious about will make you a happier and healthier version of the person you once were.
Breaking up with your soulmate won't be easy. But that doesn't mean that you won't ever find a connection so deep and intense again. Maybe you were just meant to be with this person in order to learn a few lessons so you can find
the love you deserve. On the other hand, maybe you will find a way back to each other and it'll end up working out. Whatever happens, just remember that breaking up with a soulmate is never the end. You will find love again.