Books

9 'Game Of Thrones' Book Characters That Need To Be In The Final Season Of The Show

by Charlotte Ahlin
Helen Sloan/courtesy of HBO

It's finally happening: HBO's Game of Thrones is coming to an end. We have one more season of dragons and ice zombies and ice zombie dragons before those angsty lords and ladies of Westeros leave us for good (or, you know, at least until that prequel Game of Thrones series comes out).

For longtime fans of the show, this is a time of great sadness, intense anticipation, and increasingly weird Jon and Dany theories. For fans of the books, however, things are... complicated. On the one hand, we're excited to see the thrilling, murder-filled conclusion to this particular adaptation of A Song of Ice and Fire. On the other hand, we're a tiny bit annoyed to see the show get its big finale when we've been waiting eons for Winds of Winter to come out. And on the third hand, we've got one more chance to squeeze in all those terrific book characters that were cut out of the show.

I mean, do I actually think that the Game of Thrones TV writers are going to spend their final season introducing a bunch of new characters as fan service to the die-hard readers out there? No. I don't. But I can dream, can't I? Here are the book characters we'd like to see cameos from in Season 8, because it's our very last chance:

1

Penny

Yeah, I know Tyrion is probably happier without Penny hanging around, flirting at him and getting herself into mortal peril, but hear me out. In the books, Penny and her brother are two dwarf entertainers who perform at Joffrey's ill-fated wedding... and then her brother is murdered because someone mistakes him for Tyrion. Penny winds up traveling to Meereen with the real Tyrion, forcing him to come to terms with all the gruesome ways in which his family has made life harder for the common people. Tyrion's still a nice guy without Penny, sure, but giving him a "lowborn" friend sets him up to advocate for the commoners all the more (plus, Penny had a pig and a dog and I want them to be on the show).

2

Young Griff

Hey, it's the last season. Why not toss another Targaryen in the mix, just to spice things up? Cersei has already mentioned that she's bringing in the Golden Company, an infamous army of mercenaries. In the books, though, the Golden Company is working for a mysterious teen called Young Griff... who claims to be the long lost baby, Aegon Targaryen. That would make him Dany's nephew and Jon's half-brother. Plenty of book fans think this new Aegon is a faker, but I would still very much like to see another hot Targ kid rolling up to ruin Jon and Dany's "family bonding."

3

Lady Stoneheart

OK, we all know that she's never going to be on the show at this point... but what if she was? Lady Stoneheart is the bad ass, reincarnated form of dead Catelyn Stark, and she's terrifying. Last we saw her in the books, she was about to murder Brienne of Tarth and sweet baby Podric for getting too cozy with Jaime Lannister. I just think that Game of Thrones is awfully low on lady zombie representation, and Lady Stoneheart is the only possible solution.

4

Patchface

Patchface the creepy clown is just about the only character in the books who can truly freak Melisandre out. He's a court fool with a green and red tattooed face, and a near-death experience left him kind of... scary and prophetic. He speaks in freaky rhymes and songs, most of which seem to predict future acts of violence, and nearly all of which have come true so far. He's supposed to be Stannis's fool, but honestly I'm fine with him popping up anywhere as a weird, nightmarish cameo.

5

Val

I'm not saying that I'm entirely against Jon and Dany as a couple... but Jon does have another wildling love interest in the books after Ygritte: the sort-of princess Val. She's fierce, gorgeous, and has no intention of letting the wildlings quietly submit to Westerosi rule. As long as Jon and Dany are headed back up north to fight the zombies anyway, why not turn their incest-fueled love fest into an incest-fueled love triangle? She's also kind of the de facto wildling leader after Mance dies (or, if you're reading the books, fakes his own death so he can go join a band), and I wouldn't mind a few more competent female characters in the next zombie-catching brigade.

6

Arianne Martell

Look, I don't really want the HBO show to mess with Dorne anymore. They tried. It wasn't... all bad. But if, for whatever reason, season eight does take us to Dorne, then I would like very much to see the hot-and-scheming Arianne working diligently on her plan to take over her kingdom and quite possibly all of Westeros, no matter how many fake Targaryens she has to marry along the way.

7

Sarella Sand

Alternatively, if you're looking for a freaking awesome but less politically ambitious Dornish lady to throw in there at the last minute... might I suggest Sarella Sand? She's not so interested in making herself queen, but she is interested in dressing up as a boy so she can go to grad school. Why hasn't she been in the show yet? Sam should have to go back to the Citadel to finish up his degree this season, and she should be his roommate, and then instead of a high fantasy TV show it's just kind of a cute college comedy about friendship and learning.

8

Varamyr Sixskins

I'm guessing we're going to see a lot of action up north this season, what with the zombies breaching the wall, and I would very much like to see the unhinged wildling warg, Varamyr Sixskins, right in the middle of it. He has some wolves (ho hum), a wildcat, and a freaking bear to warg into. Does he have much of a personality beyond that? No. But would I like to see a zombie fight a bear will Kit Harington looks on, broodingly? Yes.

9

The Sailor's Wife and Lanna

Here's a two-for-one, because I just want Tyrion to be happy! In the books, the Sailor's Wife is a mysterious, kind-hearted sex worker living in Braavos, and Lanna is her blonde, Lannister-looking daughter. She supposedly lost her husband at sea many years ago. Many fans believe that she just might be Tysha, Tyrion's first wife and the love of his life. Lanna is the right age to be their daughter, and Tyrion's dad did say that Tysha went "where whores go" after she was brutally assaulted by his men. If I was Tysha, I'd get the hell out of Westeros too. And honestly, anyone can have that rusty ole Iron Throne at this point, as long as Tyrion gets a tearful family reunion and then an uneventful retirement.