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Hallmark Just Released A Whole Line For People Obsessed With Their Christmas Movie

The Hallmark Channel's holiday merch line includes accessories for humans and dogs.
Hallmark.com

The Hallmark Channel’s annual Countdown To Christmas event kicked off a few days ago, but in case you weren’t excited enough about it already, I have some even better news for you: You can get tons of Hallmark Channel holiday merch now, too, according to Best Products. A collaboration between Hallmark Gold Crown and the Hallmark Channel (which, yes, are different entities), the newly-released collection is now available exclusively at brick-and-mortar Hallmark Gold Crown stores and online at Hallmark.com. As Hallmark Retail president Steve Farley put it in a press release, “Working directly with Hallmark Channel to develop this collection has been a wonderful way to bring the holiday magic of Hallmark and the network to life” — and now you can bring that magic home with you.

The Hallmark Channel holiday merch collection celebrates the 10th anniversary of the network’s annual Countdown To Christmas block of programming. Originally launched during the 2009 winter holiday season with the Hallmark original movie The National Tree, the Countdown to Christmas has since become a winter tradition for many — and the slate of programming has gotten more and more impressive with each passing year. In 2019, Countdown To Christmas will feature a whopping 24 new original Hallmark Channel movies, with another 16 premiering on sister network Hallmark Movies & Mysteries.

(It’s worth noting that, as wonderful as they can be, the Hallmark Channel holiday movies remain very white, straight, and cis, so they could perhaps do better in terms of representation — but many still find them highly enjoyable, and there’s no shame in that. As Bustle’s Emma Lord recently observed, it’s become apparent that we're currently “in the midst of a rom-commaissance,” wherein “the Hallmark Channel’s Christmas movie lineup is no longer something we feel ashamed of clogging up our DVRs, but actively celebrate with an event dubbed ‘Christmas Con.’”)

Since 2019 is a landmark year for the Countdown To Christmas, it’s only to be expected that tons of merch would roll out in conjunction with it. But lest you think that the collection is limited to just T-shirts… it is not. Oh no. It is so much more than that (although admittedly the T-shirts are all pretty great, too). For one thing, the apparel options include cozy socks, snuggly sweatshirts, and super comfy PJ pants, in addition to the expected variety of tees; those tees do, however, also come in varying fits and with a number of different necklines, so they’re not just all the same crew-neck, short-sleeved number T-shirts themed after highly specific brands usually are.

Also, there’s a Hallmark Channel Ugly Christmas Sweater (see above). It’s hideous and I love it.

However, there is far, far more on offer than solely apparel. As the inclusion of a “Kitchen & Décor” category on the collection’s landing page on the Hallmark website might suggest, there’s a large selection of things kitchen and bar ware; you have, for example, no fewer than eight different wine glasses to choose from. Each has a Hallmark-tastic slogan on it, all of which are seasonally appropriate and many of which are downright hilarious. Personally, I’m fond of the insulated, stainless steel tumbler with the lid; not only does it read, “Pairs Well With Hallmark Movies,” it is also basically the grownup version of a sippy cup, which is perfect for those of us who remain accident-prone well into our adulthood.

(It’s me. I’m talking about me. Hello, my name is Lucia, I’m in my mid-30s, and I almost spilled a full cup of coffee all down my front this morning. Yes, it was very difficult. Thank you for your support during this trying time.)

The home goods section also includes tea towels, aprons, mugs (so many mugs!), throw pillows, blankets, a snow globe — in short, everything you need for the coziest night in surrounded by all of your favorite people and things. Heck, you can even make the air Hallmark-scented (whatever that means) thanks to the scented candle that has a place of honor within the collection. Literally called the Cozy Night In 3-Wick Scented Jar Candle, it’s made of soy and burns for 30 to 45 hours; fragrance notes include sandalwood, cinnamon stick, and vanilla bean — that is, it’s not quite holiday cookie-scented, but it’s definitely gourmand, plus a little bit of earthiness from sandalwood.

I’d like to take this moment to note that the candle’s label also reads “scented soy blend candle – bougie” — and while I’m certain that in this case, “bougie” is used as the French word for candle, part of me still secretly delights in the double meaning of the term if we read it in its slangier sense. What, after all, could be more bougie than an unnecessary but delightful scented candle that can literally burn for almost two days straight?

(Don’t burn it for two days straight. Do not leave a burning candle unattended, including when you’re asleep.)

The best part is, all of this is just scratching the surface of the many delights that await you in the Hallmark Channel holiday merch collection. Head here to check out the whole line, which of course also includes DVDs of all your favorite Hallmark Channel movies and even book adaptations of those same films.

So, hey. Go ahead. Put the kettle on. Open that bottle of wine. Light your Cozy Night In candle. Let’s do this holiday thing.