The New Spider-Man Shouldn't Listen To Tony Stark

Sony Pictures Releasing

The newest Spider-Man, played by Tom Holland, made his debut in Captain America: Civil War courtesy of Iron Man, who recruited him to join the superhero big leagues in the big fight. So, it came as little surprise when news broke that Robert Downey Jr. confirmed that he would reprise his iconic role as Tony Stark/Iron Man in Spider-Man: Homecoming, the first film in the new, rebooted franchise. It's still unclear how big Iron Man's role will be in the new Spider-Man film, but it's safe to assume that Tony will be acting as Peter Parker's superhero mentor. And, while no superhero can have too many mentors, there are six lessons the new Spider-Man should not learn from Tony Stark.

In his career as a genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist, Tony has made a ton of mistakes. Even in Civil War, after years of experience, he basically caused the breakup of the Avengers because he felt guilty and put some of his best friends in jail cells. He's also self-created almost all of his villains and can be kind of a creep. But, he's also a great superhero with a can-do spirit, genius mind, and a pretty wicked sense of humor. So, while there are definitely some things Peter should learn from Tony (like, superhero suit technology, for example), there are also a lot of lessons the new Spider-Man should not learn from Iron Man, such as:

How To Treat Women

Outside of his relationship with Pepper, Tony is, quite frankly, gross with women. Never is that more clear than in Iron Man 2, when Tony can't help himself around his new secretary, Natalie. If Peter wants to be a man women actually respect, he better ignore any and all girl advice Tony might try to give him.

How To Keep A Secret Identity

Tony outed himself as Iron Man at the end of the first Iron Man film. It caused him quite a bit of trouble in Iron Man 2 and put everybody around him in extreme danger. Peter is a teenager in high school, so, it's probably better for him if he keeps his identity a secret for a few more years at least.

How To Work With Others

Tony said it himself in Avengers, he "doesn't play well with others." For Peter to really be the best superhero he can be, he's going to need to be able to get along with his fellow heroes, and fast. He might have earned Captain America's respect in Civil War as a fellow kid from New York City, but that only goes so far. In the battlefield, the Avengers need a team player, not another cocky Iron Man.

How To Be Discreet

Spider-Man and Iron Man are two very different kinds of superheroes. In the Marvel Cinematic Universe, we've seen Iron Man take on mostly big villains. He's not out there stopping bank robberies every night or avenging gang crimes in Hell's Kitchen or Harlem. Spider-Man is a much more low-key superhero, especially when we find him in Homecoming. If he wants to fight crime in his neighborhood, Spider-Man can't be making a grand entrance every single night.

How To Stay Under A Terrorist's Radar

This relates to the whole secret identity and discretion thing, but it's very important that Tony not give Peter advice on how to respond to a terrorist threat. Tony literally invited a terrorist to bomb his personal home once — it did not end well. When learning how to deal with greater threats, Spider-Man would be better advised turning to Captain America instead.

How To Shave

I'm afraid there's only room for one goatee on the Avengers team, Peter, and it's already claimed a spot on Tony's face.

So, what can Peter learn from Tony in Spider-Man: Homecoming?

Yeah, that sounds about right.