If you're an avid online dater who's yet to find a lasting relationship, you've no doubt wondered if there's some sort of secret to finding love on a dating app that you're as-yet-unaware of. While there might not be a magic formula that will guarantee you immediate online dating success, there are still plenty of things you can do to improve your chances of success on dating apps — it's just a matter of learning the difference between good and bad dating app behaviors.
To give some much-needed insight into what dating app success stories have in common, selective dating app The League recently launched LeagueLove: a place for engaged or newlywed couples who met on the app to share their stories and give insight into what their online interactions really looked like.
"There is data behind finding love on dating apps and sharing this data with our community brings us one step closer to our mission on moving the needle of society towards creating stronger more equal partnerships," Meredith Davis, Head of Communications at The League, tells Bustle. "People like to complain about dating apps. We all realize there are frustrating parts but if sharing these success stories encourages users to log in daily, be more active, engaged and open-minded it may lead them to say yes to more dates. We believe in investing in your dating life."
The League analyzed user data from 100 success stories — aka users who met on The League who have been dating for one year or more — to figure out what behaviors they had in common, and how their online dating activity compared to unsuccessful matches. Here are six things The League's success stories had in common... and who knows, maybe this info can help you find your own online love story.
1They Exchanged More Messages Before Swapping Digits
On average, LeagueLove couples exchanged 34 messages back and forth — about 15-17 messages per person — before trading phone numbers. Compared to other matches (who sent an average of 10 messages), successful LeagueLove couples took some more time to really get to know each other before taking the next step towards planning a date.
2They Kept Messages Lighthearted & Personal
If you want to win over a match, keeping your convo fun, lighthearted, and personal is the way to go: over 70 percent of LeagueLove couples' conversations used each others' first names, and ended at least one sentence with "haha" or an emoji.
3They Had A High Number Of Prior Matches
Patiently waiting for the right person can be difficult, but the LeagueLove couples are proof that the payoff is well worth the wait. Unsurprisingly, successful couples didn't get lucky enough to meet one another right off the bat: they had an average of 84 matches prior to finally "hearting" ~the one~.
4They Had Similar Educational Backgrounds
You don't have to share an alma mater to have a successful relationship with someone, couples who found love on the app tended to have similar educational backgrounds. Over 50 percent of LeagueLove couples went to colleges that were ranked similarly in terms of cost and acceptance rate — and over 80 percent had obtained the same level of degree.
5They Had A Relatively Small Age Gap
For plenty of people, age really is just a number when it comes to finding a partner. But for the successful couples of The League, the average age difference between them was a modest three years, compared to an average of six years between non-success stories.
6The Woman Made The First Move
Who run the world (of online dating)? Girls! One out of every three relationships between straight League couples started with the woman messaging first. Now there's no excuse to sit around waiting for someone you're interested in to message first — if you want it, don't be afraid to go after it.
Ultimately, the best way to improve your shot at finding love online is simple: be aware of and confident in who and what you're looking for, and make sure that you're always being your genuine, authentic self. Sure, you might have to wade through a small pond of duds before finding the right person, but when you do, it'll all have been worth it.