13 Texts To Send A Friend When You Want Space

If your friend is reaching out a lot and it feels like you can’t keep up with their messages, let them know with this sweet text.

“Finding creative ways to make it more about you and your needs is a good way to communicate firmly and kindly,” says Roberts.

Let your friend know you’ll be falling off the grid for a while by sending this text, along with a rough estimate as to how long you’ll be gone. “Asking to circle back another time ensures you're not ghosting them,” Roberts says, which will make the request easier on both of you.

If you’re looking for a funny way to ask for space, go with this text. Keep in mind, though, that “text messages don't come with tones or inflictions,” psychotherapist Jhanelle Peters, M.A., B.Sc., tells Bustle, so you’ll want to make sure they know you’re just joking (the emoji helps).

If your friend invites you to a hangout, but you really don’t want to go, that’s totally OK. Peters says this text lets them know — in a very polite way — that you won’t be able to make it, while also keeping the door open for the future.

If you aren’t sure when you’ll feel ready to reconnect, send a text like this one. “With this response, you leave yourself in control of picking a time that works for you,” Peters says.

It also shows that you appreciate being invited, which makes it easier to say no without feeling rude.

Similarly, this approach communicates your need for space in an easygoing way while also reinforcing your desire to connect again soon, Dana Basu, PsyD, a licensed clinical psychologist, tells Bustle. Simple as that.

This text lovingly acknowledges the importance of your relationship, says Leah Rockwell, LPC, LCPC, a licensed professional counselor, while also making it clear you’re busy.

The wording here puts the onus on you, says Behr, so that your friend won’t think they did something wrong. It’s perfect for friends who might take a “no” personally.

As mentioned above, sometimes friendships hit bumps in the road and it becomes necessary to take a break and give each other space. If that happens, this text might help explain how you’ve been feeling while also buying you time to reset.

If you tend to feel guilty when asking for space, therapist Sara Sharnoff Tick, MS, LMFT suggests immediately following up with other plans.

That said, don’t feel bad if your friend has a negative reaction. “Some friends may struggle once you begin setting boundaries,” Tick tells Bustle. “You may need to evaluate those relationships and see if they should continue being a part of your life.”

Even though it’s tempting to craft an elaborate lie when asking for space, therapist Liz Hughes, M.Ed, LPC, RYT 200 recommends resisting the urge. It’s much better to have integrity, she says, than to assuage guilt with a fake story.

Not to mention — good friends can always tell when you’re making things up.

Leave out indirect words, like “I might make it” or “hmm, maybe!” As Hughes says, “Being clear in your communication leaves less wiggle room for the other party to argue with you.”

Once you send this text, go ahead and enjoy your alone time — no questions asked.

“This blames no one — hence it’s more likely to be received well — and it reaffirms the relationship with the closing sentence,” Kimberly Perlin, MSW, LCSW-C, a licensed clinical social worker, tells Bustle. And what could be better than that?

While it might seem scary, asking for space creates an opportunity to actually feel closer to your friends, says Perlin, because you’re being open and honest about your needs. It’ll also give you a chance to take good care of yourself, which is what any good friend would want.