If you’ve never given oral sex, then it might be time to give it a try. Even if it’s something you’re not sure you’re interested in, you might be surprised to realize that it’s totally your thing and something you really enjoy. Experimentation is what keeps things hot and spicy, and yes, that’s how you want to keep things in the bedroom.
Giving oral sex is a pretty intimate experience. Whether you’re on the receiving or giving end of it, there’s an intimacy to it, that some people feel is even more intimate than sex. For example, I never give blow jobs when I’m just casually hooking up with someone, because for me that’s something one needs to earn. I want to feel a level of trust and a bond, before I take things in that direction. And, to be honest, I give fantastic head, so I’m not about to just dole it out to anyone coming down the road.
But if you’re new to the oral sex game there are things you should probably know in advance, and if you’ve been giving head for years, you can still learn a few tidbits that you may not have thought about before. Here are seven things every woman should know about giving oral sex.
1. You Should Never Feel Like You Have To Give Oral Sex
Although I am suggesting that you give it a try at least once in your life, just so you can know for sure whether or not you’re into, you should never, EVER, feel like you have to give oral sex. Even if your partner has gone down on you, you shouldn’t feel obligated to do anything you don’t want or just simply aren’t in the mood to do. Never let someone badger you into it or make you feel guilty for not wanting to do it.
2. Not Everyone Likes Getting Oral Sex
It’s true! Even though we tend to think that all men like blowjobs, that really isn’t the case. Some men, just like some women, would rather do anything else in bed than receive oral sex, so if that’s the situation, go with it. Also understand that if someone doesn’t like it, it’s not because you’re not good at it ― some people just don’t feel comfortable with someone’s face all up in their groin area, and that’s OK.
3. You Should Vary Your Technique
Whether you’re going down on a man or a woman, you can’t just stick to one technique. For guys, combine licking and sucking, while paying attention to his balls to. For women, although the clitoris is the most sensitive part of a woman’s body and epicenter of the pleasure zone, paying attention to her labia or even the inside of her thighs is hot, too.
4. There’s No Right Or Wrong Way To Give Oral
When it comes to oral sex, different people like different things. What may feel awesome for one person, might feel dreadful and messy to another. Since that’s the case, there really is no “right” or “wrong” way to give oral sex. Communicating with your partner and listening to their direction is what makes the whole experience the way it's supposed to be for you two.
5. It’s OK To Take A Break
Not everyone can orgasm from receiving oral and even those who can don’t always come in a matter of a couple minutes. If you find that you’ve been giving oral for an excessively long time and your mouth and tongue are getting cramped, then ease up, try something else, or focus on another part of their body. You don’t want to give yourself lockjaw, because you overdid it in the oral category.
6. Own It
If you go into giving oral with fears that you’re going to mess it up, then your partner is likely to feel that energy. You should never give oral while thinking, “I totally suck at this.” Instead, as you crawl your way down to your partner’s nether region tell yourself, “I got this. I’m awesome at giving oral sex. My partner is going to have their mind blown.” Going into it with confidence will help you put aside your insecurities and really give it all you have.
7. Enjoy It
As I said, you should never feel like you have to give oral sex, but if you’re going to do it, do it with gumption and enjoy it. The more you enjoy giving oral, the more your partner will enjoy it, and it will be fun for both of you. Sex is about having fun together; not one person having more fun than the other.
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