Entertainment

Zachary Quinto Should Check In To 'AHS: Hotel'

It's nothing short of astounding how many incredible actors Ryan Murphy manages to cram into one season of his FX show American Horror Story . Not only does he have a stable full of veterans who return season after season, but he's always adding more every year and finding room for incredible guest stars as well. That certainly helps take the sting out when certain actors announce they won't be returning; but while we've all come to grips with the fact that Jessica Lange has moved on to greener pastures, there's another AHS vet that has been MIA for far too long. Will Zachary Quinto be in American Horror Story: Hotel ?

Sadly, it doesn't appear as though the actor — who recurred in Season 1's Murder House and was promoted to the main cast for Season 2's Asylum — will be returning to the AHS fold anytime soon. While doing press for this summer's action film Hitman: Agent 47, Quinto told MTV that, "I haven’t had any conversations about going back to American Horror Story and I’m focused on a lot of other things right now, so I think the timing probably wouldn’t work out at this point." Bummer.

If a busy schedule is the only thing that's keeping Quinto away from AHS, here's a suggestion: he should guest star as a character he's already played before! That'll cut down on his prep time — and now that it's been confirmed that every season of the show is connected, audiences should be used to seeing familiar faces pop up. Here are six Quinto roles that would feel right at home in the Hotel Cortez:

1. Chad Warwick, American Horror Story: Murder House

We already know that Hotel will connect directly to Murder House through the character of Marcy, the real estate agent that sold the Harmons the titular abode back in Season 1. I know the ghosts that are trapped in the murder house aren't typically allowed to roam free, but perhaps Quinto's hilariously sarcastic Chad could take advantage of Halloween to attend a fabulous masquerade in the Cortez's ballroom.

2. Dr. Oliver Thredson, American Horror Story: Asylum

Of course, with connections to Murder House in place already, perhaps Hotel should consider syncing up with another iteration of AHS. Quinto's character from Asylum, the sadistic serial killer known as Bloody Face, would fit right in with Season 5's Ten Commandments Killer and The Addiction Demon. Episode 4 of Hotel will focus on a "devil's night" dinner attended by real-life serial killers like Aileen Wuornos and John Wayne Gacy. It would be neat to see Thredson in their company, as though he were just as factual as the rest.

3. Ace, Girls

HBO's Girls has had its fill of grating characters, but Quinto's Ace (who appeared in two Season 3 episodes) just might take the cake. Introduced as the ex-boyfriend of Gillian Jacobs' Mimi-Rose, Ace was always smirking, self-absorbed, and perpetually holding a toothbrush, for some unexplained reason. We already know Glee 's Darren Criss will be checking into Hotel as an insufferable hipster who irks the staff with his ridiculous requests; maybe Ace could check in with him. I'm sure no one would mind seeing him fall victim to the Ten Commandments Killer. (Too bad there's no commandment against obscene narcissism.)

4. Harry, The Slap

Even if you didn't watch last year's NBC miniseries The Slap , all you really need to know about it is that Quinto played a horrible human being who slapped another person's child in the face. While such a thing may be outré in the bougie backyards of Brooklyn, something tells me that the Countess's brood of bloodsucking babes may be in need of stern handling at some point. Lady Gaga's character kidnaps children and raises them on the hemoglobin of her victims; unless the whole staff and clientele of the Cortez want to end up sucked dry, they should consider calling in Harry, who obviously has no qualms showing terrible tots who's boss.

5. Sylar, Heroes

Fans of NBC's Heroes were bummed when Quinto declined to return to the fold for this year's Reborn . Maybe he can make it up to us by having Sylar pop by the Hotel for a quick visit? In a season that will feature an orifice-less demon with a drillbit dildo, a man who magically slices open people's brains would be far from the weirdest thing on the show. By the end of the original Heroes, Sylar had turned from terrifying villain to full-fledged antihero. How great would it be to see him swoop in and save the day, just when all hope was lost?

6. Spock, Star Trek

Hey, Asylum already introduced aliens to the world of the show. So, why the heck not? OK, if Quinto playing an actual Vulcan is too weird even for AHS, then he could easily play a super-nerd who's cosplaying as the character while staying at the hotel for a nearby Comic Con or Star Trek convention. Too bad his residency at the Cortez wouldn't exactly help him live long and prosper...

A sadly Quinto-less American Horror Story: Hotel premieres on FX this Wednesday at 9:00 p.m. ET. Now console yourself by watching Quinto and Jessica Lange trade fabulous b*tchy bon mots in this clip from Season 1:

Images: Giphy (6)