Here's What He Really Wants This Xmas

With sex presents for the holiday, you kind of can't go wrong. So when shopping for a male partner this holiday season, you might as well go with a sex-related gift. That’s why I’ve decided to take it upon myself to compile the ultimate holiday buying guide for the hunky dude in your life.

Since finding a proficient sex toy for men can be hard (or expensive), I wanted make sure that there was a sex toy that fit everyone's budget – even for those who don’t have any budget at all! And since a quality toy for men can be hard to find (because, admit it: guys don't have nearly as many sex toy options as women – even less so if he doesn't want anything getting close to his butt) some of the items below are toys that are best used as a couple – something you can both benefit from.

As somebody who’s had the opportunity to test out many sex toys in his career, I’d like to believe I have the expertise to declare which sexy gadgets on the market are worth your hard-earned cash. And needless to say, I very much approve of the items below and am confident he will as well.

1. Kiiroo Pearl + Onyx Couple

Kiiroo Pearl + Onyx Couple , $300, Kiiroo

With this couple’s sex toy, distance is no factor, as the Pearl (the toy intended for the female, which is a very effective vibrator) and the Onyx (the male counterpart – a Fleshlight, essentially) are bluetooth compatible and react to each other’s movements due to its touch sensitive skin and capacative technology. All movement that occurs within or outside of the Pearl translate to the rings found within the Onyx, creating the most realistic long-distance sex a couple could possibly have. A recommendation: call your partner on video chat to add even more authenticity to your sexy session.

2. A Subscription To Pornhub Premium

Pornhub, $9.99 a month

In my opinion, nothing says “I’m the best girlfriend in the world” more than a partner who is a-OK with her partner watching porn (and vice versa). So this year, give the gift of quality, legal porn for only $9.99 a month with Pornhub Premium – an on-demand service for porn, essentially. This inexpensive membership grants subscribers access to over 13,000 full-length videos, as well as thousands of other media in the best quality with no ads – all of which can also be accessed through a phone.

3. Fleshlight

Fleshlight Classic Pink Lady , $65, Amazon

While not the most imaginative sex-related gift for your guy (considering it’s the best-selling male masturbator in the world), if he doesn’t have a Fleshlight yet, he should. Ideal when masturbating the traditional way isn’t doing the trick (or you’re just not in the sex-having mood after a long day at work), your partner can instead use the incredibly realistic (trust me, I’ve tried) Fleshlight, which comes in a variety of shapes and molds, including some that are modeled after his favorite porn stars.

The Fleshlight website is hosting a ton of deals and packages for the holiday season, so visit the website before the month’s end and save!

4. Fleshlight Shower Mount

Fleshlight Shower Mount , $29, Amazon

If he already has a Fleshlight and you want to get him something that adds a hands-free approach, the Shower Mount is the add-on he’ll love, and will certainly get the most use out of. With this innovative device, he can fasten his beloved Fleshlight to the wall of a shower or any secure, flat surface and get it on.

5. LELO Billy

LELO Billy, $89, Amazon

If your partner is into butt play and you don't want your fingers anywhere near that, then let LELO’s Billy do all the work. I've recommended the Billy as it’s much smaller in size compared to competing products, which makes it far less intimidating, and the gadget is expertly shaped to hit his G-Spot, meaning there’s no guesswork involved.

6. Tiani 24K

LELO Tiani 24K, $399, LELO

The Tiani 24K is a favorite of mine. The toy can be used effectively by yourself and makes for the most effective couple’s sex toy I’ve ever used. Designed to be worn internally during intercourse, the Tiani adds a powerful vibrating sensation that aids in stimulating your G-Spot, clitoris, and his penis, all due to it’s fantastic dual motor design. Also, just in time for the holidays, LELO has released a 24k gold version of the sex toy, adding to the luxury that LELO products are already renowned for.

7. A Flirty Coupon Book

If you have no cash to spend this holiday, then get crafty and make him a fun, kitschy coupon book, promising him his favorite sexual acts when he presents you with your handmade coupons. It’s a gift you can make for free, it's creative, and it involves sex, so needless to say, he won’t be complaining.

Want more of Bustle's Sex and Relationships coverage? Check out our video on sex positions for small penises:

Images: LELO (2), (2), (1), Giphy (2)