No matter how satisfied you are with your sex life, there’s probably always room to learn how to have better orgasms. With exploring, openness, and lots of communication you can probably take all those mediocre or “just good” climaxes to an entirely different realm. And the best part is that there's not just one way to have an orgasm, plus you can have so many different types of orgasms that you shouldn't even just limit to the ones that are vagina-related. It might be time for you to branch out a bit, if you’ve yet to do so.
It’s hard to get an exact reading on how many women are satisfied with their sex life. While one study will say only 25 percent of completely satisfied and 30 percent are totally unsatisfied, you can come across another study that says women are really satisfied with their sex life, but only if they’re lesbians and/or young women. See? It’s hard to get a straight answer.
Because orgasms are the stuff of happiness and something of which a lot of us can’t get enough, it’s time to work on making them stronger. Here are seven activities that you can do to take those orgasms up several notches.
You are never too young to start doing your Kegel exercises! Kegel exercises strengthen the muscles in your pelvic floor and are beneficial in many ways. When you get older they help with incontinence and keeping your uterus in place, especially if you’ve had many children, and when you’re younger strengthening those muscles will give you stronger orgasms.
2. Have Sex With Someone Funny
While sex alone is a great way to strengthen all those muscles that lead to great orgasms, a 2015 study found that women who have sex with funny men have not just stronger, but more orgasms. The study deduced that women who are more attracted to their partner, which is often the case with funny guys, is a major “predictor of the number and intensity of orgasms,” as well as overall sexual satisfaction.
3. Practice Edging
When I interviewed Betty Dodson for a piece about a year ago, she introduced me to “edging.” Edging is when you bring yourself close to an orgasm, then you back off. You do it over and over again, controlling your orgasm, then, when you can’t stand it anymore, you let yourself climax… and OMG MIND BLOWN CLEAR OUT OF THE WATER AND INTO OUTER SPACE. Having built up all that tension, then releasing it gives you an orgasm you didn’t even realize possible. I strongly suggest you try it. NOW.
4. Masturbate Like There’s No Tomorrow
In masturbating you’re getting to know your body in ways that no other person can. You’re exploring and experimenting; finding new techniques and ways to touch yourself. When you masturbate you uncover the tricks and secrets of your body! And that’s what makes for stronger and more intense orgasms. When you masturbate, you can even work on your edging.
5. Incorporate Toys
Personally, if I want a really strong orgasm and quickly, I reach for my favorite vibrator. I put it on the highest speed and WOW. Although women have a different response to vibrator sensation, there is no doubt that a vibrator can offer both a different sort of orgasm and a stronger one. Fingers are great, too, of course, vibrators can really take intensity to a whole new level ― and one you might find you prefer even more than what you’ve been doing.
6. Exercise – At Least Sometimes
While I’m definitely the last person to suggest anyone go running to the gym, because you can actually eat foods that make orgasms stronger instead, from a physical standpoint, getting your blood pumping is great for orgasms. When we exercise, our blood circulates more than if we were just lying on the couch and great circulation, mean better orgasms because some of that blood is circulating right on down to your sweet spot ― that would be your vagina for those who haven’t had coffee yet today.
Your final tip to stronger orgasms? Communicate with your partner. If you've found on your own what real gives you effing phenomenal orgasms, tell your partner. If they need help, give them directions. Great sex, awesome relationships, and fantastic orgasms all come from communication.
Want more of Bustle's Sex and Relationships coverage? Check out our video on sex positions for small penises:
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