17 Honest Oscar Movie Reviews That Will Make You Reconsider This Year's Nominees
Listen up, movie lovers, the big night is almost here. Yes, Sunday will be the night... that Leonardo DiCaprio wins his Oscar. Of course, DiCaprio isn't going to be the only actor likely to take home a nice golden statue — Oscar night is sure to be a big night of celebration, and an interesting evening of #OscarsSoWhite critique, courtesy of host Chris Rock, as well as possibly a few presenters. Winners and potential controversies aside, let's take a look at what the Oscars are really about: movies. I'm guessing that, like me, most Oscar viewers have not seen every single film nominated this year, or every snubbed film either. So, if you need a little refresher before the Academy Awards, here are the biggest Oscar movies reviewed in one sentence.
A lot of this year's big Oscar movies were excellent, but some were not. It's a law of nature that not all movies are movies are created equal. It's also a law of nature that not all Academy Award nominees deserve the honor, at least in many people's opinions. As with any other year, some movies were snubbed, while others were shown a bit too much love. But hopefully, these one sentence reviews will help you figure out what movies are worth seeing regardless of who takes home the awards. So, here we go: Oscar-nominated and snubbed movies reviewed in one sentence.
1. The Revenant
Leonardo DiCaprio grunts his way to an Oscar.
2. The Big Short
A funny, well acted film about the financial crisis that doubles as one of the most horrendously edited Best Picture nominees since Les Miserables, IMO.
The perfect romantic drama starring two of the most charming young actors around, Saoirse Ronan and Emory Cohen.
Brie Larson leads this excellent film with a beautiful and emotionally exhausting performance — but be warned, tissues are highly encouraged.
5. Mad Max: Fury Road
Like Fast and Furious, only better and more feminist.
6. The Martian
Gravity, only worse and less feminist.
An excellently acted, well-executed drama that proves that a movie about journalists who uncover horrors in the Catholic Church can be good and popular at the same time.
8. Bridge Of Spies
A perfectly well-made but forgettable Steven Spielberg war drama that, despite Tom Hanks' great performance, is essentially just white men talking.
Cate Blanchett is stunning in this over-manicured period piece that, regardless of its imperfections, really should have gotten a nod for Best Picture.
10. The Danish Girl
A great cast is wasted by an unsatisfying script and Tom Hooper's visual style.
11. Steve Jobs
Doesn't live up to the performances of its stars Michael Fassbender, Kate Winslet and Seth Rogen.
12. The Hateful Eight
Over three hours of Tarantino's bloody fantasies.
The best movie of 2015 and also the most under-appreciated, Creed should have gotten director Ryan Coogler and Michael B. Jordan Oscar noms.
14. Ex Machina
A stunning, complex and deeply disturbing science fiction drama that also features Oscar Isaac doing a boogie.
15. Inside Out
Pixar strikes again, this time with feelings!
16. Straight Outta Compton
NWA told their story in Straight Outta Compton, which, like Creed, failed to get the recognition it deserved at the Oscars.
17. Star Wars: The Force Awakens
The Force Awakens surpassed expectations by effectively rebooting the Star Wars franchise while also breaking down gender and race barriers in blockbuster movies.
Whether you agree or disagree with the one sentence reviews above, I think we can all agree on one thing: DiCaprio, you deserve this! Oh, and Oscar season, I'll miss you when you're gone.
Images: 20th Century Fox; Giphy (16); chrisevas/tumblr