13 Of The Weirdest Celebrity Quotes About Dating
When it comes to Hollywood, celebrities constantly make headlines for dating someone new, breaking up, or getting married. Let's face it: People are heavily invested in famous folks' love lives. Although it may seem like a celeb's life would be easier when it comes to dating, they sometimes struggle, just like everybody else. Not all relationships are picture-perfect (but Chrissy Teigen and John Legend come pretty close). If Kim Kardashian taught fans anything, it's that you have to kiss a few Krises before you find your Kanye. OK, maybe that analogy only applies to her love life. Plus, she never actually said that quote, but still, celebrities have said some wacky things about dating over the years.
Some of their comments will make you laugh out loud, while others may make you feel confused. There may be some cringing involved too. I guess just because these singers, actors, and comedians make a ton of money, it doesn't mean they have things any easier when it comes to romance. After all, money can't buy true happiness.
To prove that the struggle can be very real, here's a round-up of the strangest things celebs have said about dating. Because it's not all rainbows, butterflies, or smiley faces over in Hollywood either.
1. Conan O'Brien
In a 2003 interview with Elle magazine, Conan O'Brien revealed what he thinks women want. The latenight host said,
I’ve always heard that women secretly want their father. So I used to walk around in a 1950s business suit, with a hat and a pipe. My opening line would be, "You should be getting to bed now."
I'm going to guess he's wrong about that one. Also, considering he's a comedian, I'd like to think he was joking.
2. Justin Bieber
In his 2010 autobiography Justin Bieber: First Step 2 Forever, the "Sorry" singer wrote about his first date. He said,
My first date has been sort of mythologized as "Bieber’s Dating Disaster." I took her to King’s a buffet restaurant. Yes, I wore a white shirt. Yes, I got spaghetti. No, this was not the brightest idea. But it wasn’t a big trauma, though.
Really, Bieber? Spaghetti? This also totally means he must have spilled on himself. Poor guy.
3. Selena Gomez
In a January 2016 interview with InStyle U.K., Selena Gomez divulged her dating struggles. The "Same Old Love" singer said, "I feel like I look 16 sometimes, which is a bummer, because I would love to date older guys."
Not to knock Gomez for her insecurities, but the quote is a little weird, because she's essentially saying she looks like a child and therefore can't date the men she wants. She should pursue whoever her heart desires.
4. Jennifer Lawrence
During an interview with Vogue, Jennifer Lawrence said quite a bit about her love life — or lack thereof. The Hunger Games star said that "no magic" happens in her bedroom, adding,
Cheers to my hymen for growing back!
In typical J. Law fashion, she's incredibly candid. She elaborated, "I am lonely every Saturday night. Guys are so mean to me." If that last part's true, that is a sad thought.
5. Rob Delaney
In October 2013, Rob Delaney tweeted about how to tell if you've found the one. I think you can officially stop dating, if you've met the Catastrophe star's standard. He wrote,
it’s probably not love if you don’t press your face to the toilet seat after they’ve used it to feel their warmth
That's a new approach, huh?
6. Taylor Swift
When Glamour asked T. Swift for dating advice in 2014, her key tip was "don't yell." She elaborated,
Silence speaks so much louder than screaming tantrums. Never give anyone an excuse to say that you’re crazy.
Maybe "weird" isn't the right adjective to describe this Swift quote, but it is a little bizarre. Of all the dating advice in the entire world, her words of wisdom are to not raise your voice.
7. Brad Pitt
When it comes to taste in movies Brad Pitt has specific preferences. He once told Rolling Stone,
I'll tell you what I've learned in my span of dating. The dating spans of goods and bads. If Madonna's Truth or Dare is her favorite, run. Run. If she was taking notes during the Sharon Stone cross-your-legs scene in that hit movie Basic Stinky, run. Run!
To be honest, most of those references went right over my head. I'd like to think, though, he'd still love Angelina Jolie, even if she was Madonna's number-one fan.
8. Kim Kardashian
During a behind-the-scenes video interview with Tatler magazine in 2012, Kim Kardashian listed her dating turn-offs. Here's her list:
Anything having to do with bad hygiene. Like teeth or nails or big ears. I'm really weird about stuff like that.
Up until she said the "big ears" thing, the quote made a lot of sense. Also, does this mean she scrutinizes Kanye West's fingernails?
In a previous interview with Elle, Drake revealed what he thinks on dates. He told the magazine,
If you happen to be with somebody who isn't someone you want to converse with, you start feeling like, I wish I was just here watching True Blood by myself.
This quote isn't entirely inaccurate. Who wouldn't rather be watching TV than on a bad date? But considering Drizzy has a reputation as a romantic, it's a little surprising for those words to come out of his mouth.
10. Carrie Underwood
She may be happily married now, but in her song "More Boys I Meet," Carrie Underwood sings one of the best dating quotes of all time. She says, "The more boys I meet, the more I love my dog." I can't help but laugh at that quote — and maybe it's not entirely untrue. Dogs are the best.
11. Andy Cohen
The Watch What Happens Live host told People last March how he feels about online dating apps. Cohen talked about Tinder and explained why he loves it. He told the magazine,
Where am I going to meet an architect who lives in Brooklyn besides Tinder at this point? It's the modern-day singles bar.
This LOL-worthy quote is a bit strange, but super true.
12. Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer is one of the most candid people around. Plenty of the Trainwreck star's quotes serve as great dating advice, but one soundbite stands out as a little strange. At a SXSW panel last March, Schumer talked about the casualness of dating. She said,
There's a guy right now I've been texting with, and I really don't see myself having a bathing-suit wedding with him, but I'll probably have sex with him.
Obviously, she's allowed to sleep with whoever she wants. This quote made the list because I'm wondering: What is a bathing-suit wedding? Did she just invent something new?
13. Aziz Ansari
The Master of None star wrote an entire book about Modern Romance. When promoting this book, Aziz Ansari talked about dating in an interview with NPR. He summed up the whole process with the most unique analogy. He said,
When you hear a Flo Rida song at first you're like, "What is this, Flo Rida? It's the same thing you've always done. I'm not listening to this song." And then you keep hearing it and you're like, "Oh my God, Flo Rida. You've done it again! This is a hit, baby!" And that's what people are like. People are like a Flo Rida song. You need to hear them a couple of times before you really get what they're about.
In case you got distracted and started humming "Right Round," what he means is that dating someone and getting to know them is like listening to the same song multiple times; it takes a little while to know whether you're into it.
Next time you need some dating advice, I wouldn't recommend consulting the celebrities above. But at least you'll be reminded you're not alone in your love-life struggles.