21 Ways Anyone Can Be A Better Kisser
Because kissing is important in love and sex, especially since it’s usually your first initial physical contact with a new partner, a bad kiss can end things before they even start. A 2012 survey by the State University of New York at Albany found that the majority of people will end a relationship because of a bad kisser, with 59 percent of men and 66 percent of women, saying adieu to someone who just can’t kiss very well.
I do think that bad kissing is subjective. While you may not like to have your teeth licked during a makeout session, I’m sure someone out there does, and if that makes them happy and turns them on, then good for them! I once had a guy suck on my chin, and although I thought it was horrifying, I believe he’s out there right now sucking on someone else’s chin and they’re LOVING it.
According to research the effect a great kiss has is like a drug. As the body’s most prominent erogenous zone and packed full of 12 cranial nerves that shoot impulses to our brain, an awesome kiss can actually make you feel high. But without all those negative side effects of actual drug addiction.
But no worries, you guys; you and anyone can be a better kisser, and here are 21 tips to prove my point.
1. Keep Your Lips Moisturized
Breaking news: Lip balm is for everyone! Lube up on those lips! No one wants to kiss cracked and dry lips.
2. Avoid Stinky Foods Before A Kiss
If you know that your chance to make out are very good, then skip the garlic, raw onions, and excessive coffee. Granted, sometimes a hot kiss isn’t planned, but if you can prep for it, do so.
3. Have Mints On Hand
Hey, you never know when a kiss could happen.
4. Follow Your Partner’s Lead
When it comes to kissing, it’s about compromise — especially if you and your partner don’t have the same technique. So, if you notice you have different techniques, try letting your partner lead the way...
5. Or, If Need Be, Lead The Way
Or, if things are going in a territory that isn’t your kissing scene, then take the reins and YOU lead the way.
6. Remember There’s More To Kissing Than Just Lips
A really awesome makeout session is about the neck, the earlobes, the collar bone, and maybe a bit of playing biting, too. Never forget this important fact!
7. Educate Yourself About Other Erogenous Zones
While, yes, those lips are packed full of nerves, they're not the only erogenous zones in that general area. Like the neck and earlobes, as I mentioned above, but the shoulders and fingertips, too.
8. Don’t Be Scared To Be Honest
If the kiss isn’t going well, then don’t be afraid to say something about it and suggest trying it again. It will be a learning experience for both of you.
9. Have The Tongue Versus Lips Chat
True story: Some people are more into lippy kisses, while others prefer more tongue. This is definitely something to discuss so you can get on the same page. Although, I think a lot of us can agree that tonsil hockey is never fun.
10. Give Positive Feedback To Each Other
Nothing seals a great kiss like telling each other, “You’re a great kisser.” People love to hear when they’re doing something right.
11. Get Passionate
Passionate kisses aren’t something that comes from giving it only 60 percent. So, either give it 120 percent, or go home.
12. Don’t See It As A Necessary Step To Sex
Although I know that kissing, for some, is something you do to work your way up to sex, but don’t see it like that. Kissing, in itself is really satisfying, but if you’re thinking of it as a step, then you’ll miss out on the satisfaction.
13. Be In The Moment
Similar to having great sex, you need to be in the moment when you’re kissing. You shouldn’t be thinking about anyone or anything else. You won’t get the most out of it, if you let your mind wander.
14. Don’t Compare Your Partner’s Kissing Techniques To Past Partners
Never, ever compare partners’ kissing or sexing techniques! While doing so doesn’t make you a bad person at all, it is an unfair way to approach physical intimacies, because we all do things differently.
15. Don't Be Afraid PDA
As Americans, we’re not as open when it comes to PDA as our European counterparts. (Have you ever walked the streets of Paris on a nice spring day? Tongues everywhere!) But maybe we should be a bit more open to the idea of PDA, because why should you put off the urge to kiss someone you’re really into just because you’re out in public? Something to think about.
16. Kiss With Your Whole Body
Pull your partner close to you, put your hands on their face, lower back, or in their hair… you know, really go for it.
17. Don’t Fear Being The Initiator
If you want to kiss someone and you know that they want to, but they’re shy, then lean in and just do it. If you misread their signs and they politely tell you no thanks, then apologize. But, I do think that if someone wants to be kissed by you but are too shy, you can totally pick up those signs and read them well enough to make an appropriate decision.
18. Have Regular Makeout Sessions
Practice makes perfect, and kissing is healthy AF (and fun to boot)!
19. Pay Attention To Your Partner
This isn’t just about following your partner’s lead but being cognizant of how they react to a playful lip bite, an ear nibble, or a neck kiss. When someone is really enjoying something, they let you know with signs and signals, so pay attention to that.
20. Close Your Eyes
Fun fact: When you block out one sense, the other senses become heightened. Also, it’s weird to have your eyes open when you’re THAT close to someone else’s faces.
21. Give A Bad Kisser A Second Chance
If you want to be the best kisser around, then if you come across a bad kiss, consider giving that person another chance. I’m not saying you should expect miracles, but being open is what makes someone a great kisser.
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