When it comes to dating, you can’t win them all. You have to figure that for every good date you have, there’s bound to be a bad one to even things out. While there are good and bad dates, and “meh” dates in between, sometimes you come across another type of date situation: The date who looks down on you.
As to why someone would look down on you, of all people, can vary. Some people need to look down on others to make themselves feel better. That right there is pretty text book actually. Others look down on people, because that’s just their thing. And some look down on those around them because they firmly believe that they’re better in some way. They're not better than you — so don't let them feel like they are.
If you happen to find yourself on a date with one of these people, you’ll know something is off. From the way they look at you to all their excessive eye-rolling, it will be quite clear that something is a miss with them — not you. Is your date looking down on you? Here are 10 signs to tell. But first, check out the latest episode of Bustle's Sex and Relationships podcast, I Want It That Way:
1. They Raise An Eyebrow At Your Outfit
You tried on everything from your cute cropped pants to a skirt to a dress to those yoga pants that can totally pass for “real” pants. You have made an effort; I mean, you got out of your sweatpants for this, dammit! And yet, despite the effort you made, you realize that you just caught your date giving you the once over with their eyes then raised an eyebrow. WTF. You look hot.
2. They Give You The ‘Really?’ Face When You Order Dinner
Honestly, when I’m out with someone who orders something I don’t like, I may revert to being a 5-year-old and immediately pass judgment. You did NOT just order a baby cow. But, on a date, I manage to keep my face stoic when someone orders something that I don’t like, because it’s their dinner and their choice. But if your date gives you the “really?” face when you place your order, as in they don’t even bother to conceal their judgment, then you know someone thinks they’re all high and mighty.
3. They Shake Their Head When You Voice Your Opinion
Opinions, by their very definition, can’t be wrong. Although you may opine that someone opinion is wrong, they’re still entitled to it. It’s called life. So if you notice that your date is shaking their head at your opinions, you know those things that you are allowed to not just have but share, then that’s a clear indication that they’re looking down on you — and your opinions. It’s a double blow.
4. They Roll Their Eyes At Most Of What You Say
Rolling one’s eyes is a great way to communicate dissatisfaction. I’m sure you rolled your eyes easily a dozen times before noon today, because people, man. However, eye rolling on a date, especially a first date, isn’t just a sign that your date is looking down on you but they have little to no respect for what you have to say.
5. They Say 'What?' A Lot
Why? Because they're not listening. And they're showing you that they're not listening, so as to make sure you pick up on the hint that they're better than you.
6. They Judge Your Career
So maybe we all can’t be doctors and lawyers with degrees from Harvard — so what? Ever career and job serves a purpose, hence the reason the position exists. If your date is judging your career in any way, they’re definitely looking down on you. Although someone’s job doesn’t necessarily define them, no one needs what they do 40+ hours a week sh*t on by a date.
7. They Don’t Really Give You The Floor To Talk
If they're dominating the conversation and keep cutting you off, it’s probably your turn to roll your eyes.
8. They Make Comparisons Between You And Their Ex OUT LOUD
Although we all know that one of the biggest no-nos on a date is talking about your ex, a sign that your date looks down on you is when they compare you to their ex, especially if everything you say and do isn't as fantastic as everything their ex says and does.
9. They’re More Into Their Phone Than Having A Conversation With You
So they’ve made it clear that everything you say is somehow beneath them, they haven’t really given you much time to talk, they made sure to let you know that their ex is better than you, and now they’ve pulled out their phone to really drive home the fact that they look down on you.
10. They Give The Old 'I Don't See This Working Out' Line At The End Of The Night
It not just that they say this line, but it's how they say it... as they're recoiling back from you to even shake your hand goodbye and giving your outfit the stink eye one more time for good measure. Yep; it feels crappy.
But look on the bright side it’s time to go home and get back into those sweatpants. Besides, your couch misses you and would never look down on you. Ever.
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