I’m the first one to admit that I can be pretty lazy in bed. As someone who lives her life in black and white, with little room for a gray area, I either give sex 120 percent or 10 percent… or maybe it’s more like five percent. Although that might be generous, too. But the fact is, as someone who has a really high sex drive, I almost always want to have sex and at least 50 percent of the time I want to have lazy sex. Which is absolutely not a bad a thing, especially because I’m aware of it and I always tell my partner, “I’m going to take the lazy route during sex. You’re in charge.”
Although sex is, and should be the combined effort of two people, each one doing their part to please each other, that’s not always the case. For example, when you role-play, there’s a likelihood there isn’t a give in take, especially if there’s some BDSM involved and someone takes the complete submissive role. So when one partner is feeling lazy, there’s no give and take either. Again, I’d like to reiterate, it's totally fine. Some days, I honestly think that the best sex position in the world would be spooning… while I’m eating pizza. However, I’ve yet to find a partner who wants to try this, because pizza jealousy is a real thing.
The point is that wanting to bang and be lazy about it can happen to the best of us. So when it does, you just need to know what positions are best for it. Here are nine that will fulfill your every aching need to be lazy AF.
How to do it: With both you and your partner on your side, facing the same direction, get into the spooning cuddle position. So cozy, right? Next, have your partner enter you vagina from behind. You may have to lift your leg a bit, so they can get in there nice and deep.
Why it’s great for when you’re feeling lazy: Is there anything lazier than lying on your side and being penetrated from behind while you just take it all in — literally and metaphorically? In this position, your movements are really limited, so you’re having your partner do all the work. I mean, you can push yourself back against them for deeper penetration, but if you remain still, really embracing your laziness of the moment, it’s not like either one of you won’t enjoy yourself.
How to do it: Lie back, with your legs spread a bit, and let your partner enter you. Voila! Super easy and an amazing back-to-basics sex position everyone loves.
Why it’s great for when you’re feeling lazy: You basically get to just lie there. Sure, you can lift your hips up and gyrate against your partner, even using their pubic bone to stimulate your clitoris, but it’s really not necessary. Or… you can continue to keep things nice and lazy and add your vibrator to the mix. It’s like music to the ears.
3. Modified Doggy
How to do it: Instead of being on your hands and knees, as you would for traditional doggy style, while your partner penetrates you from behind, lower yourself down. How far down? You can lower yourself so you’re flat against the bed, with your partner on top of you. It’s not only lazy, but modified doggy style is more intimate and really hot. What more could you want?
Why it’s great for when you’re feeling lazy: Again, you’re just lying there and enjoying someone else doing all the work. Of course, if you want, you can make a little bit of effort by closing your legs and clenching your vaginal muscles to give your partner a tighter fit, so you both benefit, but to do that is like nothing — especially if you’ve been doing your Kegel exercises regularly.
4. Mutual Masturbation
How to do it: Pick a comfy spot near your partner, then just do your thing while they do their thing. “Thing” being masturbation in this case.
Why it’s great for when you’re feeling lazy: You don’t have to worry about satisfying anyone but yourself. You and your partner can enjoy both the intimacy and sexy factor of masturbating together, but you also get to be totally selfish, which is, in itself, totally lazy — and awesome.
5. The Cross
How to do it: With your partner on their side, facing you, you want to lie perpendicular to them with your legs draped over their hips. Next, with a bit of finagling, they should enter you from this angle.
Why it’s great for when you’re feeling lazy: For this position, it’s like you and your partner are just hanging out — you’re on your back, they’re on their side, but they’re also inside you. There’s no rushing it, in fact, this is a position that makes men last longer, and it’s just super chill.
6. Legs Up
How to do it: It might be easier to start in missionary for this one, then lift your legs, so your partner is sort of penetrating you from a higher angle than they would during traditional missionary.
Why it’s great for when you’re feeling lazy: In this position, you’re not just on the bottom, but with your legs up, you’re resting them on your partner’s shoulders — which means, your entire body is just, well, resting while your partner penetrates you. But during all this “resting,” because your legs are up, both you and your partner are experiencing some deep penetration, making your G-spot pretty damn happy.
7. X-Marks The Spot
How to do it: Find yourself a comfy spot to lie down, then lift your legs, crossing them at either your ankles or knees; whatever is most comfortable for you. Next, your partner should hold your legs up and in place, while penetrating you from a standing position. The fact that you’ve made the “X” with legs, will create a tighter sensation, making it a perfect position for partners with smaller penises.
Why it’s great for when you’re feeling lazy: There really is no work involved here at all. You’re lying there, your legs are being held up, so there’s little energy being exerted there, and your partner is just thrusting away while using your legs as leverage to pull themselves deeper. All you really need to do is enjoy it and let out a few “ooh” and “aahs.”
8. The Sofa Brace
How to do it: Find the closest available sofa. Hopefully, you won't have to go too far for this. Next, on your knees, drape your torso over the back or side of this sofa, while your partner penetrates you from behind. What you’re really doing is doggy style, but there’s a couch to support you, as opposed to your arms — because that whole holding yourself up with your arms thing can get exhausting fast.
Why it’s great for when you’re feeling lazy: You have that couch that you’re just hanging over and, ideally, it’s a nice fluffy couch, so you have the soft aspect of that combined with your partner penetrating you, so it’s like you’re winning all around. Winning all around, I might add, while being totally lazy about it, which is like extra winning all around.
9. Dangling Over The Edge Of The Bed
How to do it: Lying on your back on the bed, with your hips at the edge of the mattress, your partner situates themselves between your legs in a standing position. Then they take your legs in their arms and start penetrating you.
Why it’s great for when you’re feeling lazy: If you haven’t noticed the theme yet, most of these positions involve some level of lying down, and this one is no different. Lying down during sex doesn’t mean that you’re automatically being lazy, but it definitely gives you the opportunity to be lazy, if you choose to be so. With this position, you’re just lying there, being penetrated, and basically living your best life. If you think you can’t orgasm in this position from penetration alone, then add some clitoral stimulation… then you definitely are living your best life.
Being lazy and still wanting to have sex are two totally normal things that can sometimes go hand-in-hand. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to get off and be lazy about it. Just communicate to your partner that you’re in a lazy sort of mood, so you’re handing the reigns over to them. That way, when you go from one lying down position to the next lying down position, they’re not wondering if you’re counting down the seconds until you get to nap.
Images: Caroline Wurtzel/Bustle