11 Ways To Understand The Law Of Attraction & How To Use It To Get What You Want

For some people, it seems like the stars repeatedly align, as if they wrote their own destiny. Despite challenges or hiccups, these people come out of even the toughest situations unfazed, blessed in one way or another by what seems like a miracle. How do they do it? And what if you learned there was a secret to cultivating the life you want? It sounds pretty crazy, but the Law of Attraction is something that many people believe in. So what's the deal with all of it, anyway?

The concept of manifesting destiny, which rests on the Law of Attraction, is the idea that investing positive energy and belief in any desired outcome will allow a person to bring the outcome to fruition. In other words, you have the power to get what you want simply by believing in it. Sound a little crazy? Maybe. But if people swear by it, it's worth at least exploring, right?

Manifesting destiny and attracting the appropriate energies is, of course, a very fickle, tricky concept. To learn more about how to play it right and build the life you've always dreamed of, I consulted with experts  Cali Estes, PhD, Life Coach, Recovery Coach and Founder of The Addictions CoachApril Masini, relationship and etiquette expert and popular media resource; and Davida Rappaport, intuitive psychic with over 35 years of experience. Here are 11 ways to understand the Law of Attraction and how it applies to manifesting the destiny you desire.

1. Set A Clear Path & A Clear Plan To Manifest Destiny

"Law of Attraction is very simple. You have to know what you want. You focus on the positive aspects of what you need, desire, or want to manifest. Positive attracts positive; negative attracts negative. This is where the saying 'misery loves company' came from. Lower-level energies will flock together. If you want to manifest, you envision rising above these energies and staying in the positive. ... This can be further detailed by saying that if you think it, it will come. Words have power and thoughts can be energy," according to Estes.

Manifesting destiny relies on you first identifying what you want, setting out a clear plan to get there, and thinking positively about the outcome.

"Recognizing that you want to try something new and different is the first step. Figuring out where you’ve gone wrong is the next step. Recognizing the negative places in your life, and the mistakes you’ve made are important next steps towards using positive approach to manifest your destiny. And finally, focus on intentions and behaviors that are positive and geared for your successes," Masini adds.

2. Positive Thought Breeds Positive Outcome

"Scientific experiments using a placebo effect for health reasons have shown that if you believe something will make you feel better. Rven if it is a sugar pill and not a true medication, it will cause you to think you feel better and then you do. ... Every time you think of a negative thought, you need three positives ones to negate it. If you focus all your positive energy on a positive outcome, it will happen. You can see this with prayer, as people focus on sending a positive message up in prayer for a positive outcome," Estes explains.

The importance of positive thoughts and energy is paramount in the quest to manifesting destiny. Only our cognitive behavior has the power to lead us to where we want to go.

"When you focus on manifesting a positive destiny, you’re naturally aligning your intentions and your behaviors with positivity. This is going to affect your health, your relationships, and your successes in a positive way," Masini tells me via email.

3. Negative Thought Breeds Negative Outcome

"If you focus on the negative, again, you attract the lower-lying energies, and yes, you ultimately create negative. Try creating a parking space in the mall at a busy time. Focus on your space, envision it; do not allow any negative thoughts to creep into your mind, and simply stay in the positive. It may take you a few times practicing this to get it right it, but then it becomes second nature. The flip side of this as well is, psychologically speaking, if you continue to focus on something, you generally start to believe it is true, and then it ultimately will come true simply because you have followed that train of thought," Estes breaks it down.

Wherever your mind concentrates its energy is the reality it breeds. Just as this rule applies to positive thought and outcome, it applies to negative. Do not allow negative thoughts to overwhelm your desires when it comes to what you do not want.

"Without realizing it, you may be focusing on negative outcomes. You could be hyper-focused on fear of failure or so obsessed with what will happen if you fail — so much so that you’re putting your energy into failure and not success. That’s how negative outcomes occur," Masini further explains.

This is where confidence comes into play over low self-esteem or fear. Control your thoughts to control your destiny.

4. Manifesting Destiny Won't Always Happen You Envision

"It may not be exactly as you imagine it – say you make $35,000 as a writer and you imagine making $100,000. You may get an offer in a different field that meets the money requirement or possibly a different style of writing than you might be used to or an assignment that you did not expect. Point is, you will get what you ask for, even if it is not exactly as you had imagined. Now if you have no job and no income and ask for a Maserati, you probably won’t get it. You might, however, meet a new friend who has one and get to drive it," Estes states clearly.

Manifesting destiny does not correlate to making your wishes come true like a hypothetical genie in a bottle might have the power to do, but what you invest energy into will always appear in some shape or form. Be so aware and focused on what you want that you don't miss it waiting for something bigger.

5. Manifesting Destiny Puts You In Full Control Of Your Happiness

"If you feel in control of your life, you are more likely to be happy and excited about getting out of bed and enjoying your day. If you feel like a slave to your job, you will be miserable and angry most of the time. If you can create a life, a job, a family that you want, you will cherish it and be excited daily," Estes tells me via email.

The benefits to manifesting destiny are clear: If you feel like you have the power to control your future, your days will feel much more promising, fulfilling, and generally happy.

6. Repeating Daily Affirmations Supports Manifesting Destiny

"It takes roughly three times of repeating the positive ideas to negate the negative thoughts. Try a vision board. List five things you want to focus on this month and constantly repeat them daily like a mantra. For example, my vision board says, 'Money flies at me from all directions.' Sometimes, I get a large-paying client, and sometimes, I simply find a quarter on the street. Point being, money is coming to me from everywhere. After you focus on what you want, you need to keep in that mindset. If you allow any negative thoughts to creep in, you will reverse or negate all the work you just did," Estes recommends. 

The cardinal rule of manifesting destiny is obvious: remain positive. From the moment you wake up each morning to the moment your head hits the pillow every night, your energy and thoughts should be dedicated to positive affirmations. The more you think it, the more you believe it, the more you start to see it.

7. Manifesting Destiny Believes That What You Give, You Receive 

"[Manifesting destiny and the Law of Attraction are best explained by] the Law of Karma. It basically states that you will get negative if you think negative. For example, if you say, 'I never win anything' and you enter a raffle, you simply won’t win. You declared you won’t. If you focus on winning, and the person next to you puts out more positive energy than you do, you won’t win. The key is to give out the same energy you want back. If you want happiness, you look for the happiness and surround yourself with it and yours will grow," Estes explains.

There are only so many ways you can say it: Conceive, believe, achieve. Know what you want, believe you can get it, make it yours by exerting confidence and positivity. You can also look at this like the concept of paying it forward: If you do something good, the universe will pay you back, and the feedback loop continues.

8. Maintain Focus & Discipline To Manifest Destiny

"Discipline is an excellent tool for changing negative thought patterns. The more you can focus and discipline yourself to recognize negative thoughts and change them to positive ones, the more likely you are to have a positive outcome," Masini suggests.

Discipline yourself to clear your mind when you're going down a dark path; you'll never come out the other end feeling bright and optimistic.

"When you focus on what you want in life, you’re more likely, on a conscious and unconscious level, to move towards that goal. Many times, without realizing it, people don’t get what they want because they’re not focused on it, on any level. Or they’re focused on failure instead of success. It’s always a good idea to focus on what you want because on some level, your conscious and your subconscious can work towards what you want," Masini further explains.

9. Don't Rely On The Universe; Continue To Work For What You Want

"Simply focusing on finding Mr. or Ms. Right isn’t going to get you there, but it is definitely going to help your process if you use other techniques as well! For instance, if you focus on manifesting your happy romantic destiny while creating a strong dating profile and figuring out your goals and deal breakers, you’re more likely to be successful than if you have a negative attitude while doing this important work towards dating smart. ... As with anything else, manifesting your destiny doesn’t happen with a magic wand. Very little in life happens with a single act — but having a positive outlook and focusing on your goal is going to move your success along, in the right direction, that much more quickly. It will also help overcome obstacles that might trip you up with a less focused and positive outlook," according to Masini.

Relying on the simple act of manifesting and cognitively focusing on what you want will not bring it to magically arrive at your doorstep. While manifesting is the foundation to creating your destiny, action is required. Work hard for what you want, if for nothing more than to prove to yourself it's actually what you want.

"If someone makes a list and does not take action, they could be considered a dreamer. Just trusting alone does not make it happen. Once someone takes action, there is a point where there is nothing else they can do. When they reach that point, trust comes into play and they should surrender to a higher power," Rappaport says further.

10. Free Will Is Unaffected By Manifesting Destiny

"You cannot request or manifest a relationship as we desire. There is a beautiful component of wishing, manifesting, etc. that people often forget: free will. One cannot make someone do what they want them to do. ... To manifest a new relationship, one needs to create a list that can easily be fulfilled. A client of mine once made a list of the qualities she wanted in a man, but she listed each request as, 'I want a man who... and a man who... and a man who...' She ended up becoming involved with three different men with each of the qualities requested, not one man with all three qualities. Manifesting can be tricky," Rappaport warns.

Be cognizant of the bigger picture. Be wise so as to manifest only what will benefit you wholly, rather than independently. Will this desire fit into every aspect of your life? Will you get caught up if this dream becomes reality? Lay it all out, be specific, and remember that other people cannot be changed.

11. Dismiss What You Don't Want To Make Room For What You Do Want

"One can work toward manifesting positive outcomes; however, there are always these statements: 'I want this but not that. I want this and that, and I want this, but if I cannot have this, I will settle for this.' These types of thoughts bring forth convoluted requests and results. Using the modifiers 'not, but, and, as well as, either/or' muck things up. The energies that guide us and assist us take the request that was uttered or written and manifest things literally (including those words). It just happens that way. I tell people to only state or write down what they want and to leave out the things they do not want. The use of modifiers often provides mixed results, which may not be what someone wants," Rappaport claims.

Again, be very cognizant when expending energy in desired outcomes. Aim for specifics, disregard taking the devil's advocate approach, and be steadfast in the positive. In general, only ask for what you want, not what you don't.

While it seems complicated on the surface, manifesting destiny is a powerful notion that empowers the mind to control your life as you see it fit to be. In the same vein as taking control of your self-acceptance, self-love, and self-confidence, no other person or entity has the power to effect change in your life than you. Take your future by the reins, starting now. What's missing in the life you want? Go get it.

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