Don't Take A Shot When You Hear The Word "Bully"

Monday night's Ladies of London finale closed as the season began: At a polo match. Though new mommy Caprice Bourret and a recuperating Annabelle Neilson were not in attendance (uh, totally understandable), the rest of the Ladies were there with bells on. But this time around, nobody wore a hat. What a difference a summer makes. We've come so far, we've learned so much. I'm so proud of the lot of us.

The lack of hats and the smaller polo match crew weren't the only noteworthy changes: A rift in the cast had developed. How major was the rift? Well, Caprice said Julie Montagu, Annabelle, and Marissa Hermer were the only Ladies to reach out to her after the births of her sons. Eesh.

I don't know where Caprice stands with Noelle Reno and Juliet Angus, but during Monday night's ep, her frayed relationship with Caroline Stanbury hit a particularly nasty snag. After their argument at Caroline’s dinner party, the two "queen bees" did not speak again. How do I know? Uh, the "post-filming update" at the end of the finale. (That's also how I know Scot Taylor proposed to Noelle Reno with a "flawless" ring, Marissa had another son, Juliet Angus had yet to take another etiquette class, and Annabelle was on the mend. I will eat up a "post-filming update" with a spoon in each hand.)

Ah, right. The dinner party. I'm not so sure it belongs in the Bravo Dinner Party From Hell Hall of Fame (there wasn't a medium puffing away on an e-cigarette, no one threw a dining table, et cetera), but it did feature one of my favorite reality TV tropes: e-evidence. The moment Caroline said there was an email that would prove Caprice asked Marissa and Noelle to host the baby shower, I began to salivate.

Come on, Caroline. Go get your laptop and fire up your inbox, I thought. Don't let me down. Someone better read that email for the camera.

Before I could begin composing a strongly-worded letter to Andy Cohen (just in case!), Caroline fetched her smartphone. Caprice then read the email out loud. Caroline looked like the cat who got the cream. I guess it proved Caroline right? Even so, Caprice didn't think the email called her bluff. (It was at this moment I realized I had been tugging on both of my earlobes for a while. I have zero idea as to why I was doing that, but my lobes still feel a little off.) Caprice and Caroline continued to argue about the baby shower. At some point, Caprice called Caroline a bully. Guess how well that went over?

Do you want alcohol poisoning? No? Then do not take a shot every time any of the Ladies says “bully" in the finale. I'm fairly certain I heard the word more times Monday night than I did while I watched the Beverly Hills Housewives' trip to Palm Springs. You want a rough estimate? I'd guess "Bully" was uttered at least 540 times over the course of the ep. I had to fan myself when Caprice provided Annabelle with a definition of the word and then said she believed Caroline fit the bill.

Farewell, LoL. I do hope we meet again, for I fell for this show hard. Ugh, how dare the season only be eight episodes long. May Bravo grant you a second season. And if there is a second season, I'll be sure to purchase a handheld fan.

Image: Bravo