How many times have you wished Beyoncé was your mom? I'll go first: at least two. But that's only because the mom I have already is super rad. Although she never dressed me as cool as Bey dresses Blue Ivy. I was mostly in my cousins' hand-me-downs. By comparison, how many times have wished Kris Jenner was your mom? I'm guessing zero. Because Beyoncé is cool. She's an amazing performer and super stylish. Kris Jenner is a trashy momager who sells her daughters' bodies like meat. So like all moms, there are cool celebrity moms, and absolutely horrific ones. And which of those cool set you choose as your most revered mom probably says a lot about you.
For instance, my admiration of Beyoncé as a mom says that I'm very strange, because not only did I grow up admiring a teenage Beyoncé, the woman is only three years older than me. Which would mean I would totally be down with the weirdest pregnancy of all time ever. Jokes about a three-year-old child getting pregnant aside (it's very Game of Thrones, no?), here's what your favorite cool celebrity mom says about you:
You crave discipline, and might have a real life Tiger Mom or Dance Mom already. You put style over comfort and will not hesitate to destroy someone who crosses you with a pointed look. You're tough as nails and radiate self-confidence which is a symptomatic of a deep need to impress your infinitely impressive mother, who you oddly have no resentment for, only love, because you know she made you the fierce person you are. Just like Beyoncé and her own mother.
You've got a sharp wit, and value fun, true-to-self style. Meanwhile, you like nothing more than to get white wine drunk with your mom in the afternoon at some trendy brunch spot. You're cool, but don't take yourself too seriously, and your mom is your bestie.
You're a momma's girl or boy. Your mom is your everything. Your dad may or may not be in the picture, but even if he's around, if they were both drowning, you wouldn't hesitate to go for your mom first. You're very protective of your mom, because you know how hard she works for you. This leads you to be a fiercely loyal person to anyone who proves themselves to you, but you'll discard anyone who seems unreliable without a second thought. If you're a boy, no woman is ever going to live up to your mother, because she's perfect to you in every single way.
4. Kate Moss
You don't see your mom a lot, but when you do, it's real. There's no pretense between you, and there's nothing you can't tell your mom. She taught you how to rebel, and you love looking through photos of her from the '60s and '70s (depending on her age). You two have an impenetrable, secretive relationship. There's nothing you won't try once, and while you can be bratty, you definitely don't mind getting your hands dirty from time to time. You run with the cool crowd, and you could also melt someone with your death stare.
5. Amy Poehler
You don't take life too seriously. You love to laugh and have a weird sense of humor. You also have a strong sense of self, and are confident and ambitious, although at the same time, you can be vulnerable and emotional, but you're not afraid to stand up for what you believe in, even if it comes at the cost of a few of your own tears. Your mom is your rock, and after an exhausting week of work, all you want to do is talk to her on the phone about your life for hours while she helps you see the light, and laugh at yourself.
You're understated but magnetic. There's something really warm about you, and people probably tell you all their secrets. You and your mother like to do yoga and go to the farmer's market together.
7. Leslie Mann
You're a nurturing soul. You're brilliant at homemaking but also totally independent and career driven. Your mum probably makes the best cookies in the world, and has passed that ability down to you. You have a strong sense of discipline, and family is the most important thing in the world to you, and you always have the most fun when your family is all together.
8. Gwen Stefani
Your mom is the cool mom. Your friends all admire her wardrobe and as a result, you put a lot of time and effort into yours. You're not afraid to take risks with your style, and if you're a woman, you're "one of the boys" and probably have a lot of dude friends. If you're a guy, you spend way too much on your hair cuts, but you have great hair, so whatever.
You're awed by your mother. You're probably super intense about fitness, and can do all the crazy hard yoga poses. You rise with the sun, and you get shit done. You love travel, and have a holistic sense of health. Your family probably does a lot of outdoor activities together, and you're happiest at the beach.
10. Drew Barrymore
You just do you, all the time and without exception. You might be a little erratic or a little wild at times, but your smile and inner warmth shine through your sometimes scatter-brained personality. Basically everyone you meet is charmed by you, and you and your mother are so open with one another, there's a candid level of intimacy that makes her your true soul mate.
11. Jennifer Lopez
You mean business. You're warm and earthy behind closed doors, but when it comes to strangers, you're icy cold and infinitely intimidating. You have a private relationship with you mother, who is probably a lioness.
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