A scary reality about relationships? You only have two real options: either they last forever, or they end. While getting dumped is not on anyone's bucket list, most people aren't thrilled about the prospect of having to break up with their partner, either. At best, it's slightly awkward, and you depart as friends. At worst, you've been cheated on and treated like crap for so long that you're finally sick of it and have to kick that loser's ass to the curb once and for all. See? Breakups: Not at all fun. But, while they may totally suck, there are certain things you can do to help yourself recuperate from doing the dumping as quickly as possible. Listening to songs that inspire you after a breakup is one thing, as is having cookie dough for dinner straight from the bucket, and signing up for a pricey kickboxing class so you can punch all of your negative feelings away.
While I can't force feed you cookie dough or ice cream, I can give you some tunes to check out when you're feeling less-than-stellar post-breakup. Here's what you should put on your playlist in order to start feeling like your fab single self again.
When Your Ex Cheated: "Irreplaceable," Beyonce
Of course Bey is going to top this list. Did your guy or gal totally suck? Did they cheat on you? Did they take the car you bought them to drive their girl on the side around town? That's perfectly fine, because you already charged a premium package moving truck to their credit card to come and get their crap from your house.
When You Didn't Care Enough: "Where I Stood," Missy Higgins
Sometimes, the person you're in a relationship with can be perfectly lovely, thoughtful, and kind... and your heart just isn't in it. Higgins' tune is about that nagging feeling that you have to let someone go for their own sake, if not yours, because someone else will love them better than you can.
When You're Done With A Jerk: "I Knew You Were Trouble," Taylor Swift
There's a certain allure of someone who is so cool and so hot who doesn't seem to need you at all. Unfortunately, that person and the one who gets you blackout drunk at a rave and then ditches to make out with an ex is often one and the same. Luckily, this "breakup" usually only involves deleting their number, because it's not like they ever called you anyway.
When You Needed To Be Treated Better: "Potential Breakup Song," Aly & A.J.
It sucks when a person you had such high hopes for turns out to be the one who never returns your calls, forgets your birthday, and treats you as a nice convenience instead of an actual person they care about.
When They Used Their Last Chance: "Too Little Too Late," JoJo
Sometimes, it's not just one thing that causes a breakup, but a bunch of small fights, unanswered texts, and seemingly "harmless" flirting with half of your school's swim team. Apologies are nice, but not when they need to be made on the daily.
When You Finally Realize How Good The Breakup Was: "According To You," Orianthi
Maybe you dumped this person awhile ago but their negativity got stuck in your head — until you found someone new who treated you exactly as you deserve.
When You Have Zero Interest In Being Nice: "The Best," Tiffany Houghton
I first heard this song last summer when I interviewed Houghton, and it's now the one I recommend to everyone who just stopped dating someone who royally sucked. It reminds you that it's okay to not want to be friends with your ex — because, uh, they were awful, remember?
When It's Just Not Working: "Better In Time," Leona Lewis
Maybe you really do love your ex, but know deep down that it's just not going to work out. This song reminds you that it's perfectly okay to feel that way, but that you'll find love — real, workable love — when the timing is right.
When Distance Killed The Relationship: "Big Girls Don't Cry," Fergie
So you just got your dream job in a place 3000 miles away from your bed buddy — and you're taking it. It's a huge bummer, but sometimes you really do have to go your own way — wallow in the misery of that situation with this Fergie tune.
When You Were Fighting Constantly: "Slow Dancing In A Burning Room," John Mayer
It's not all that surprising that John Mayer knows about breakups, considering the rumored trail of broken hearts he's left behind. (See: Taylor Swift, above.) When you've been fighting 24/7 and have officially given up on trying to make things work with your partner, pop on this depressing-as-hell Mayer tune.
When You're Okay With It Being Over: "It Is What It Is," Lifehouse
Sometimes, things just don't work out, and it's really no one's fault. Ending a relationship that has hit a wall and doesn't seem to be improving is the only healthy thing to do. This song says it's OK to be bummed, but it's also OK shrug it off and move on to something that will work out.
Plug this playlist into your music player, and you might just feel a bit better about having to end things.