If you set store by the stars, you're likely already well aware of how Mercury retrograde can affect your love life — which means you can probably imagine why proposing during Mercury retrograde might not be the best move. When you're in a long-term relationship and marriage is on the horizon, the idea of getting engaged can be both exciting and stressful. There's so much pressure to have a picture-perfect proposal that it can be nerve-wracking, for both the partner popping the question and the one on the receiving end of the proposal — and that's at the *best* of times, astrologically speaking.
"Firstly, proposals are always beautiful as they are a huge milestone in any relationship; however, Mercury retrograde is a time for readjusting, reassessing, and reevaluating current situations — not making commitments," astrologer Valerie Mesa tells Bustle.
Of course, Mercury retrograde doesn't necessarily have to be a time of love life strife (in fact, it can be a great opportunity to make improvements in your relationship) but it does bring with it certain complications which have the potential to muck up your love life — so it's best to proceed with extreme caution if you plan to make a big commitment like getting engaged while Mercury is in retrograde.
Why Is Proposing During Mercury Retrograde A Bad Idea?
It might seem silly to plan your engagement around the movements of the planets, but if you want your proposal to go smoothly, it might be a smart choice to wait until Mercury retrograde ends to pop the question. But what exactly makes Mercury retrograde a bad time to get engaged?
"In terms of relationships, making important decisions during a retrograde period could bring a surprising change of heart and/or disagreement," Mesa says. "In general, there could be complications after signing an important contract, planning a trip and all other logistics in general... It's a time to slow down, cross your t's and dot your i's. Taking a moment to think and make a few edits is always necessary. In other words, take advantage of this time to think — not make a decision."
"Don't let retrograde trick you into thinking getting married will magically fix the relationship."
Every now and then, it's good to take time to reflect on your relationships, and figure out what, if anything, you want to change or improve. But when it comes to making big commitments, timing is super important... which is why popping the question during Mercury retrograde can be particularly risky.
"Love can be affected by astrological transits, and Mercury retrograde is no exception," Jaye, astrologer at Gifted Astrology, tells Bustle. "It acts as a 'cosmic clean out' by making us review how our relationships are functioning in our lives. On one hand it can be uncomfortable, especially when you're taking stock of the dysfunctional relationships (no judgement, everybody's got them!). If there is a person in your life that is half of that type of equation (read: dysfunction junction), don't let retrograde trick you into thinking getting married will magically fix the relationship."
Tips For Pulling Off A Mercury Retrograde Proposal
Even though it might be inadvisable, that doesn't mean it's impossible to pull off a romantic, beautiful, and successful proposal during Mercury retrograde — it just might require a little more thoughtful planning and consideration on the part of the person popping the question.
"Remember that both of you are going through retrograde at the same time but most likely it's hitting your partner in a different area of their lives (in their personal astrological chart)," Jaye says. "They could feel stressed out, but maybe they're not aware of where it's coming from. Consider what they're currently navigating and be sure they are on the same page when it comes to making a big commitment. Better yet, wait until the waters become smooth again and approach big commitments when both of you are ready to give and receive love and make a life changing decision."
Right now, Mercury is in retrograde until April 15 — but if you know (or suspect) that an engagement is in your near future, there's no reason to panic: just be aware of how Mercury retrograde might be impacting you, your partner, and most importantly, how you communicate with each other. And if you're the one planning a proposal, should you actually wait until Mercury retrograde ends before popping the question? According to Jaye, if you don't mind waiting a few weeks to get engaged, it might not be a bad idea.
"If you're going to spend the rest of your life with someone, waiting a few weeks for the planetary stability and support to return would be the best plan," Jaye says. "Relationships can be a lot of work, and getting the celestial backing on your union will benefit everyone in the long run. If you feel it in your bones that the big proposal is coming, you may want to drop subtle hints that you've always wanted to get engaged in the month of May."
The good news? If your relationship is truly a happy, healthy, and stable one, not even the planets will be able to get in the way of your love conquering all... so enjoy your engagement, whenever it happens!