Friends, we have reached peak millennial. Or maybe just peak 2018. At the very least, we’ve reached peak avocado. For those of you who can’t get enough of the green, pitted fruit — yes, avocados are technically a fruit — allow me to introduce you to Avolution Fest, a music festival that’s entirely avocado-themed. Coachella who? Burning Man what?
Avolution Fest will be celebrated for this first time on June 9 in San Diego. In addition to avocado-themed food and drinks, the festival will feature music as well as avocado-inspired art installations. Chosen Foods, an avocado oil company, is to thank, praise, and worship for the event. They’re sponsoring the one-day avocado extravaganza, which is set to take place from 5 p.m. until 10 p.m.
“As this is the inaugural event, we can’t say with certainty how many avocados we will use, but are preparing to go through hundreds,” Natalie Morse, Marketing Communications Manager for Chosen Foods, told HelloGiggles. All avocado after parties may take place in my living room, provided you bring me endless bowls of guacamole.
“We love avocados so much that we wanted to create a festival celebrating our favorite stone fruit and everything it embodies,” Morse told HelloGiggles. “We want to bring together a like-minded people in our community who have a deep love for avocados.”
This is not listed as part of the event rules, but I expect anyone who shows up to Avolution Fest to truly SHOW UP. I want flower crowns but instead of flowers it’s avocados. I want crop tops made from the beautiful skin of an avocado. In lieu of culturally appropriative face paint, you best come in a full avocado face mask. I don’t know what you should do with the avocado pits yet, but you better figure something out come June.
While this is the inaugural year for Avolution Fest, it is not the only avocado-centric event happening in southern California this summer. As HelloGiggles pointed out, The Cado is a pop-up museum entirely dedicated to that delicious green superfood that is supposedly ruining millennials’ chance at buying a home. The Cado opens June 16 and runs until September 1. So, you can start your avocado festivities at Avolution, gorge on avocados for a week, and then make it to the opening of The Cado. It would be a summer adventure for only the truest of avocado stans.
If avocados aren’t your thing, 1) how dare you. And 2) why are you here? But more importantly 3) there are plenty of festivals dedicated to that one food you are admittedly obsessed with. There’s We Love Food’s chicken nugget festival being hosted in the UK this summer. Are you in a committed relationship with cheese? We Love Food is also developing a cheese festival. They also have a vegan festival and gluten-free festival planned for later this year.
What else can we expect from Avolution Fest? Pool floats shaped like avocados? Perhaps a display of extremely large avocados, like this one that’s the size of your head? There will definitely be an avocado wedding proposal. What better place to propose than the happiest place on earth: a music and art festival all avocado themed. Avolution’s website promises to have “insta-worthy” art installations. Honestly, that could just be a cross-section of one perfectly ripe avocado, and I would be satisfied. A perfectly ripe avocado is a piece of art in itself. Put that ripe avocado in the MOMA.
Tickets for Avolution Fest are on sale now for $25. As the websites puts it, “Avoid the FOMO, buy tickets before they sell out.” Nobody wants to see a millennial with avocado-based FOMO. That’s how