Thank you for being a friennnddddd. The Golden Girls changed the way we do comedy by introducing us to four older women with the most witty comebacks, total independence, and particularly healthy sex drives. If you've wanted nothing more than to have a crew like Blanche, Dorothy, Rose, and Sophia, then look no further — you can get all four Golden Girls as Chia Pets. I'm sorry, but my Halloween succulents from Target have officially been dethroned.
The Golden Girls may have started filming in the '80s, but its humor is something that we can all appreciate to this very day. Plus, the girls were never scared to talk about things that no one else on TV wanted to touch on. Truly, The Golden Girls was way ahead of its time. It was the first female-driven comedy show of its kind, paving the way for other women to step into the spotlight and give us a good laugh. It showed that women can indeed be funny and smart and attractive and desirable — and it helped bunk stereotypes that those assets in any way changed with a woman's age.
Now, though, there's a new chapter of the show ahead, because you can bring the whole gang into your home, thanks to these themed Chia Pets. I'm pretty sure I'm going to need one of each, please and thank you. Be honest with me: Have you ever seen anything so... enchanting?
In between sprouting her hair, she enjoys reading, teaching, and being pessimistic.
And here we've got her mother, Sophia.
Sophia likes long walks to the drugstore and cleaning out her purse.
They just managed to catch Rose in between St. Olaf stories, so here she is.
And finally, we've got Blanche.
Blanche loves nothing more than spending time with her friends. That's, of course, when she's not spending time with — *ahem* — her many male suitors.
There you have it. Golden Girls Chia Pets. Slightly horrifying? Absolutely. Simultaneously amazing? You betcha.
In case you needed a reminder, which I'm sure you don't, the website points out that Chia Pets are easy and fun to grow, and they'll be lush and green in only one to two weeks. Ch-ch-ch-Chia!
If you can't get your fill even with a GG Chia Pet in the house, I don't blame you one bit. Who can get enough of this foursome? We're all hopelessly obsessed, which would explain things like that Golden Girls Airbnb guesthouse. Pretty sure I want to live here forever.
And don't forget about the line of Golden Girls hot sauces. You ask why. I ask why not. Each woman got their own flavor, and with names like Bea Spicy, Desert Rose, Sicilian Fire, and — wait for it — Hot Slut, who could resist?
It'd be cruel of me not to mention the Golden Girls-themed cruise, which sets sail in 2020 and comes complete with a cheesecake party and bingo. And brace yourselves! A cookbook is coming next year. Now you'll get to make all the classics, including double fudge chocolate cheesecake. Maybe the show isn't filming anymore, but there are still plenty of ways to enjoy our four favorite girls.