Life
No, Masturbating Won't Make You Less Likely To Get Off During Sex — But Here's What It Will Do
Since the beginning of time a lot of myths have circulated around masturbation. From hairy palms, to blindness, to the root cause of acne, to worst myth of all, women don't masturbate, it seems that each generation has their own pot of urban legends specific to masturbation. While, for the most part, these are entertaining, because who really believes that they're going to grow hair on their palm from rubbing one out too much, there's still harm in these ideas. Even the ones that give us a giggle perpetuate the thinking that masturbation is wrong, because if it wasn't, then such mythology wouldn't exist. I mean, no one has ever said that eating too much pizza would result in hairy palms or that women don't eat too much pizza, because eating pizza has never been considered wrong. And neither pizza or masturbation are wrong.
Because masturbation is still taboo, there are still many concerns and misconceptions. Dr. Laura Deitsch, aka Dr. Shameless, Vibrant's Licensed Clinical Counselor & Resident Sexologist says that one of the most popular questions that comes her way is "Will masturbation make me less likely to come during sex?" Short answer: No. Here's how it actually affects your sex life, because it actually has the opposite effect.
1Masturbation Actually Increases The Chances Of Orgasms During Sex
"Masturbation is a GREAT way to increase the chances a person will orgasm during sex," Dr. Shameless tells Bustle. "Learning your body, becoming attuned to your own rhythms, and realizing the importance of breath are important benefits to masturbation when you choose to have partnered sex."
Phew! For those who were genuinely concerned, this is great news! It also makes sense. It's not as though you have a finite amount of orgasms and you can use them all up on masturbation, or that if you enjoy solo time, you're less likely to enjoy time with your partner. If you know how to get off when you're alone, then it will make it easier during sex.
2Orgasms = More Orgasms
"The more we come, the more likely we are to come," explains Dr. Shameless. "It's not an exact correlation, but there is enough of a connection to make it worth the effort."
Not only does this fall under the tier of the "practice makes perfect" thinking, by the more we do something, the easier it becomes. By this rationale, orgasms leading to more orgasms is just basic math.
3Masturbation Leads To Stronger Orgasms
As Dr. Shameless points out, regular masturbation gives your muscles a workout and that workout leads to stronger orgasms. Similar to doing Kegel exercises, with each orgasm you have, the pelvic floor is strengthened. A strong pelvic floor leads to more frequent and more intense orgasms. So, by the power of deduction, to not masturbate just seems, well, silly.
"During orgasm, the muscles in the vagina, anus, and uterus contract and then release, producing those waves of pleasure that feel so great," says Dr. Shameless. "Increased blood flow to the genitals during orgasm also maintains the integrity of the smooth muscle that lines the vagina, rectum, and connective tissue between the penile shaft and scrotum. There are huge benefits to keeping the genital vasculature pumping on a regular basis."
4Masturbation Is Good For Your Relationship
If you know how your body works, then your partner will benefit, too. Not only can you show them what to do and how to do it, through mutual masturbation and other techniques, but if you can get yourself off, you're literally giving your partner a third hand. And everyone can use a little help sometimes.
"Masturbation helps you know yourself well enough that you can communicate to a partner what feels great, how fast or hard to go," says Dr. Shameless. "Basically how to get you off."
5Masturbation Makes You Want Sex Even More
"The hormones you release during masturbation, make you want sex more often," says Dr. Shameless.
Not only do orgasms bring about orgasms, but the hormones released during orgasms — oxytocin, also known has the "cuddle hormone" —make you want sex more, because it feels so damn good to have that hormone pumping through out system.
Masturbation will not make you less likely to come during sex. If anything, it's going to have the exact opposite effect. So, you know what you should do: masturbate.
