This Is The Best Sex Position You’re Not Doing Enough Of

Nope, you don’t need to be flexible.

by Laken Howard
Originally Published: 
You don't need to be flexible to do the legs on shoulders sex position.
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There are tons of sex positions out there. Lesbian sex positions! Adventurous sex positions! Lazy sex positions! And lists are great, but sometimes they can get overwhelming. You can keep scrolling for hours not knowing which to try first. That’s why a deep dive spotlighting one extra enticing option for you and your partner to tackle can be even better. Just like when you’re at a restaurant: sometimes you want to peruse the menu, other times you just want the chef to tell you what’s good. Thankfully, we’ve got you covered.

Rachel Hoffman, LCSW, Sex Therapist at the Long Island Institute of Sex Therapy, tells Bustle, that the legs-on-shoulder position, aka the rock 'n' roller or The Plow, is a position couples should try give a shot. "It is a more advanced form of the missionary position," Hoffman says. "Some might think you need to be flexible, but this is certainly not the case."

Here’s how legs-on-shoulders is done: one partner lies on their back, and lifts their legs up into the air, creating a right angle with their body. The other gets on top, gently pushing the first partner’s legs back a bit further toward their body. If you’re worried you won’t be able to keep your legs up, don’t sweat it. Your partner can use their hands to grab your legs to make sure you're stable or use them to touch you, Hoffman says.

Why Legs-On-Shoulders Is The Perfect Position To Try

Margaret Flatley

A lot of time we assume we need to be super limber to add some unexpected novelty into our sex lives, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. If you're down to try something in bed that requires a little flexibility, the legs-on-shoulders position is the perfect place to start. But what makes this position special enough to be at the top of your to-do list?

"This position is perfect because it adds a little oomph to those romantic 'looking into each other's eyes' positions," Hoffman says. While this is a great position for any time of year, Hoffman adds it might be even better in chillier months. “With the movements of this position you will be warm in no time. Many people enjoy the missionary position and feel that they want to stick to something that makes them feel pleasure. This position is a great next step to try because it gives missionary a little flare, but you can remain equally connected to your partner. While [your partner] rocks back and forth, [you both] will feel pleasure from the deep thrusting."

If missionary is one of your favorite classic positions, transitioning into this position is just one small movement away — but the sexual payoff is anything but small. A tiny change in the angle of a sexual position can unlock lots of different sensations for both partners.

"This is the perfect position for those couples who are nervous to create big changes in the bedroom," Hoffman says. "First off, it is great that couples know what they like. Why change things up when you feel so much pleasure? There is no need to go [wild] if you prefer to stay in your comfort zone. However, a position like this is a small change that can yield great rewards."

What Makes The Legs-On-Shoulders Position So Hot

In case you need any more convincing that this position deserves a place of honor in your sex position rotation, Hoffman says the small effort required by the position will be well worth it, and that it's sure to please for both partners.

"That sense of dominance can feel extremely sexy," Hoffman says. "While all of this is going on both partners can look deeply into each other's eyes. This gaze can be super arousing, leading to greater pleasure for both partners."

And as with any position, if you want to really up the ante, all it takes is adding a couples' sex toy into the mix to add extra stimulation and maximize pleasure for both partners.

And while we’re on the subject of domination, it might be worth it to explore some of these sexy BDSM games. Here’s one sex therapist Vanessa Marin previously shared, called Prove Your Devotion: “For those of you who haven’t yet had a conversation about your boundaries, here’s a sexy way to open one up. Have the sub make a list of everything they’d be willing to do for their Dom. Think about it in terms of how the sub could show prove their subservience to their Dom (of course, don’t forget that the sub still gets to have their own boundaries). Include sexual things, like, ‘allow my Dom to penetrate me anally’ or ‘allow my Dom to wake me up in the middle of the night to have sex.’ The sub can also include things that aren’t explicitly sexual, like, ‘I will wear a collar during the day’ or ‘I will do chores around the house.’”

But back to legs-on-shoulders. You might want to do it as-is, or you may decide it needs a little extra oomph. "Additionally, if you really decide to stick to your position, why not incorporate a toy simultaneously (such as one from Dame products)?" Hoffman suggests. "Those vibrators are small but can bring great pleasure into the bedroom. That way you can stick to what you know best but heighten that already incredible orgasm."

In practice, the legs-on-shoulders position is so hot that you might not feel the need to spice it up at all. No matter how you do it, though, this is one position that's definitely worth trying.


Rachel Hoffman, LCSW, Sex Therapist

Vanessa Marin, sex therapist

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