While signing up for a dating app or site can feel like walking into an all-you-can-eat buffet at five star hotel, it doesn’t take long before you realize you’re still eating that McDonald’s down the street. Since it's peak online dating season, there's a good chance you're exploring new sites or apps or spending a little more time on the ones you've been on for a while. Some sites are full of unsolicited dick pics; some sites batter you with barely any conversation; and some sites are just exhausting after so. much. damn. messaging.
Yes, there is a lot of disappointment built into online dating. But, unfortunately, there’s a lot of disappointment built into any kind of dating. I think the reason we get so annoyed with online dating in particular is that it takes a lot more work that dating any other way, you know? Checking back in, browsing profiles, messaging, setting up dates… All of that probably takes up significantly more time than, say, going to your local watering hole and striking up a conversation with a stranger every week or so.
So here are the top six disappointments of online dating. Read them, laugh a little, and then put your phone down and say hi to someone you think is cute.
1. When Everyone Sucks
You’re super pumped to sign up for a new site, only to discover that it’s populated by the same people that made you abandon the old one. Whether they're sexist, closed-minded, or all looking for sex when you're looking for love — this can be a huge frustration. This seems to especially be a problem for small town folks.
2. When You Get An Unsolicited Dick Pic
Sure, welcomed dick pics can be disappointing, too (lighting matters!) but they're especially upsetting when they're unsolicited.
3. The Pre-Meet Ghosting
You talk and talk and message and message and yet someone in all of those minutes spent talking, you never manage to actually set up a date. One or the other of you ghost and suddenly you’re mourning something that never even was.
4. The Your Pic Was Definitely From 20 Years Ago Moment
Classic. You show up and your date looks nothing like their pic. DID THEY NOT REALIZE THIS MOMENT WAS COMING? Ciao.
5. The You’re Actually Hella Boring IRL Realization
Super witty rapport online; dull as a brick IRL. This happened to me a lot when I was online dating. I seemed to attract awkward dudes who had mastered the art of “talking” via chat but just couldn’t seem to make it work with their vocal chords. It was simultaneously frustrating and sad, ‘cause I felt bad for them. Le sigh.
6. The Post-Good Date Ghost
You meet up, they look like their pic, they’re funny, there’s some spark. Maybe you guys make out a little bit or go to bed together. You’re thinking: Sweet! I hit the online dating jackpot! JK!! They ghost on you and you think, not for the first time: I’m definitely deleting Tinder.
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