Playing With A Guy's Balls, In 11 (Gentle!) Dos & Don'ts
We’re always hearing that we could be having better sex, a better orgasm, or a better relationship. But how often do we hear the nitty-gritty of how we can actually better understand our deepest desires and most embarrassing questions? Bustle has enlisted Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist, to help us out with the details. No gender, sexual orientation, or question is off limits, and all questions remain anonymous. Now, onto today’s topic: how to stimulate your guy's testicles.
Q: “I’ve never paid much attention to my boyfriend’s balls (or any guy's testicles for that matter). and never thought it was that big of a deal. The other day when my boyfriend and I were hooking up, he nervously asked me to play with his balls. I totally froze up because I had no idea what the heck to do. Testicles have always seemed so strange to me. I know they’re really sensitive, and I don’t want to hurt him. Any tips for what to do with balls?!”
A: Thanks for your question! Testicles can be perplexing to a lot of women, but they’re really not that complicated. Testicles are so frequently left out of the fun that even the simplest licks or touches can leave your man breathless. Here are the dos and don’ts of playing with your guy's balls, plus some ideas for how to stimulate them.
Do: Pay Attention To Them
Even if your boyfriend hadn’t explicitly asked you to play with his balls, I would still recommend any sexual partner getting familiar with their man's testicles, assuming the guy is cool with it. Of course, everyone is different, but most guys enjoy having their balls touched, licked, and played with. There are nerve endings there, after all.
Don’t: Body Shame Him
A lot of women think that balls look "funny" or "weird," so balls wind up being the brunt of a lot of teasing. But please remember to treat your partner’s body the same way you would want them to treat yours. Would you want your partner laughing at the shape of your breasts, or saying “ew, I don’t know if I want to touch those” about your labia? Don’t think so. Don’t embarrass your boyfriend for wanting his balls stimulated, and don’t make any comments about how they look. Soon enough you’ll learn to appreciate the unique charm of testicles!
Don’t: Be Too Rough
You’re right that the testicles can be pretty sensitive. Many guys have had experiences of being accidentally hit or kicked in the balls, so there’s an added layer of PTSD-like fear. Be gentle with his family jewels, especially during your first explorations.
If you’re really worried, ask him to show you how much pressure you can use before it starts feeling uncomfortable for him. Wrap your hand around his testicles, and ask him to put his hand on top of yours. He can squeeze or tug to show you what level of stimulation feels good for him, and can tell you when it starts to feel too intense.
Don’t: Be Too Gentle
On the other hand, testicles can be a bit ticklish if you touch them too softly. Try cupping his balls or rubbing them with the palm of your hand at first. Your fingertips are more likely to create a tickly sensation, especially if you’re nervous, but your palm will be more sturdy.
Do: Pair Ball Play With Other Activities
A lot of guys love having their penises and balls stimulated at the same time. I mean why not; it’s double the fun. Try giving your boyfriend a hand job with one hand while you play with his testicles with the other. Or suck on his balls while you stroke his shaft with your hand. You can also try caressing his balls with your hand while you give him a blow job.
Do: Turn To Them To Slow Things Down
If your boyfriend tends to orgasm on the faster side, you can take breaks from hand jobs or blow jobs to play with his balls. He’ll still feel pleasure, but not with the same kind of intensity that propels him towards orgasm.
Don’t: Get It Twisted
Despite appearances, your guy's testicles don't float freely in his scrotum. Don’t try to move your boyfriend's balls around in his scrotum too much. You can play with them individually, but the lefty needs to stay on the left, and the righty needs to stay on the right. Too much twisting can cause a lot of pain.
Do: Pay Particular Attention To The Seam
The area between your guy’s two testicles (sometimes referred to as the “seam”) can be especially sensitive. Put your thumb on the side of his sack facing you, and your pointer finger on the side facing towards his back. Very gently hold the skin between your fingers, and slide your fingers down the length of his sack. Let go and start over from the top. Or you can stroke the seam with your tongue.
Do: Experiment With Your Technique
Every testicle is different, so it’s worth playing around to find out what your boyfriend likes! Here are some ideas to try:
- Cup both of his testicles in one of your hands.
- Gently caress his testicles with your fingertips.
- Play with each testicle individually.
- Gently pull down on his entire sack. (The key word here is gentle!)
- Put lube on his testicles and explore how that changes the sensation.
Do: Use Your Mouth
Your tongue and mouth can create some amazing sensation on his testicles. Try out each of the following techniques:
- Lick his testicles. Play around with keeping your tongue wide and flat versus more pointy.
- Try replicating a figure-eight motion around his sack.
- Trace your tongue from the back of his scrotum, along the seam to the front.
- Hold his testicles in your mouth and swirl your tongue around them.
Do: Ask What He Likes
Your guy is the expert on his own balls. Ask him if he plays with his balls when he masturbates, and have him show you his techniques. Or try out some of the ideas I mentioned above, and ask him which ones he likes best.
Have fun exploring!
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