Relationships tend to happen quickly, but they can also end just as soon as they began. At the start, you might experience butterflies and exciting adventures, but certain signs your relationship might end can lead you to back away from these happy, special moments and turn into a darker reality. While a breakup is tough, no matter who ends it, sometimes it's really for the best.
As a certified health coach, I work with clients on deciding when a relationship isn't meant to last, as it might be causing strain and hardship. If you're becoming less happy when you're with your partner, or the relationship is rocking your confidence, it might be time to call it quits. Staying in an unhealthy relationship, long-term, can hurt your health, mentally and physically, as it never feels good to be around negative energy so often in the day. No matter how long you've been dating your S.O., the breakup will still probably hurt, and the time for closure and recovery is definitely based on the individual. If you've taken the giant step to end your relationship, just know it could be the best thing you've ever done. Here are 13 little clues to help you realize that it's time to move on and put the relationship in the past.
1. You Don't Feel Safe Opening Up
"As a coach that specializes in working with women who have suffered from disordered eating, poor body image and low self esteem, I have seen one too many women hide their past problems with food, their body and themselves. When you share your struggles and difficulties you not only strengthen your bond through your vulnerability but you also set the precedence for an open and nonjudgmental relationship for the future," says life and wellness coach Dana Peters over email with Bustle.
2. Family Drama
While you can't always find the perfect family to bond with, some families are especially difficult, and if the drama is causing tension in your relationship with your partner, it might be best to end things. "While I'd advise anyone to execute their best judgement, it's never the best idea to keep secrets about your family. Ultimately the truth comes out and your partner may question why you felt you couldn't be straight with them about any of your family issues," adds Peters.
3. Not Being On The Same Page About Money
According to Michelle Sinkovits Ferguson, Divorce Attorney & Partner at Greenberg & Sinkovits, LLC, over email with Bustle, not being on the same page about money and finances can cause arguments in relationships and jeopardize the success of partnership in the future.
4. Jealousy Over Past Relationships
Jealously can be evil in relationships and it can really rock a foundation of trust. "Anyone who makes assumptions about you based off who you've dated in the past is probably not worth your time. So be upfront about who you've dated and forthcoming about the negatives and positives of those relationships," says Peters. If your partner is judgmental, it might be time to end things.
5. Differences In Raising Children
If you and your partner differ in terms of raising children (or even having children, for that matter), it could signify that this relationship may not work long-term, advises Ferguson. Make sure you and your partner feel the same way about kids and how you'd like them to grow up.
6. Lack Of Communication
Ferguson also cautions against a lack of communication, as it's critical for building a safe, trustworthy relationship. If you and your partner can't get through conflict together, or arguments tend to go on for far too long, it could be a clear sign that you're not meant to stay together.
7. Boredom & Fatigue
If you or your partner and tired and bored in the relationship, all the time, it might mean that there's no chance to save the romance and spark. Of course, you can try a vacation, more date nights, or different activities, but if that doesn't help, it might be better to just move on.
8. Fighting All The Time
If your home has become more like a battlefield than a safe haven, it might be best to call it quits. Normal fighting is natural in a relationship, but if you're always fighting in your relationship, where it outweighs the more positive, loving moments, it's a sign it won't work out.
9. Thinking About Other People
If you're always thinking about other people in your relationship, wondering "what if" you were with them instead, it might mean that you've lost the spice in your relationship and are no longer compatible. If this is the case, it's best to address it and see if there's any saving the relationship.
10. Avoiding Each Other
If you're not seeing each other as often, by choice, or are even avoiding each other, it could mean you've lost interest and should end things. If you're happy in your partnership, you probably want to be around your S.O. as much as possible. If you aren't feeling it, it's time to break up.
11. Trying To "Fix" Your Partner
If you're constantly trying to "fix" your partner, hoping that he or she will change, it might be better to go your separate ways. It's always more beneficial to accept your partner, for flaws and all, and to not feel so dissatisfied in who they are.
If there's abuse in the relationship, of any kind, it's time to say goodbye. Abuse, both emotional and physical, should never be tolerated, and if it happens, it's a clear indicator that you need to move on and separate. While it might be scary, it's a necessity to heal.
13. Not Being Sincere In Apologies
If you're not being genuine in apologies, and are just trying to move on from the tension and have some peace, it could mean you're done putting in the adequate effort to improve in the relationship and be good with your partner. When apologizing, it should matter to you.
If you notice any of these clues in your relationship, it might be time to end things and move on to something that could make you happier down the road.
Images: Pixabay (14)