With all of the themed decorations, heart-shaped chocolate boxes that seem to line every single store, and the well-dressed couples snuggling in restaurants, Valentines Day when you're single can be straight up nauseating.
For almost every Valentines Day that I've been single, I have admittedly spent the day filled with bitterness and resentment for the happy couples I would see frolicking the streets. I felt a sense of anger that I was (still) single, and more importantly a deep sense of sadness that I did not have anyone to give me a card or chocolates. I strategically tried to plan my day where I could avoid public spaces, and I cloistered myself in my room, where I was safe from the evil and permeating influence of Valentine's Day. Until last year.
Last year, I wanted to make a change to how I spent my Valentine's Day. I had recently underwent a tremendous growth where I had come to value myself and appreciate my independence. This was the year I was going to make a change and make the active, mindful choice to be happy. My girlfriends and I were determined to spend our Valentines Day together, uplifting each other and celebrating life.
After much deliberation and a boozy Mimosa brunch, we arrived at the conclusion that we were going to throw an Anti-Valentine's Day. We excitedly created a Facebook event page, with the cover image of a heart broken in half, and we invited all of our single friends. Once the day came, we decorated my apartment with heart-shaped confetti and pink lighting, which we created by covering my lamps with pink tissue paper. We served pink sherbert-spiked punch and all of our favorite treats. We danced and cherished each other's company. Finally, I felt that I had learned the true meaning of Valentine's Day: to express our gratitude and love for the people who mean the most for us.
If you're feeling down on this Valentine's Day, here are eight ways that you can uplift yourself and celebrate singlehood:
1Treat Yourselves To A Spa Day
This time of year, spas will be having special deals on couples massages and spa treatments, but good news... You don't need a partner to spoil you and your friend to a relaxing spa day!
2Engage In Some Self-Care
On Valentine's Day, it is totally understandable (and normal!) that you may feel down or discouraged about your relationship status. View this as the perfect opportunity to treat yourself to some self-care. Whether it be taking a trip to the nail salon, buying that cake you've been eyeing at your local bakery, splurging on a candlelit dinner, or relaxing in a steamy bubble bath, take the time to spoil yourself. You deserve it!
3Go Shopping for a New Vibrator
Like with your favorite spa, sex toy brands will be having special Valentine's Day deals. My favorite sex toy brand, Babeland, is offering you 15 percent off on gift sets and couples toys, as well as free Valentines shipping. I would recommend to oh so adorable Power to the Pink gift set.
Babeland Power to the Pink Gift Set, $73, Babeland
4Create A Zine
This is the day to celebrate your independence and freedom! Creating a zine allows you to empower and express yourself. If you're like me, channelling your emotions into art will be a cathartic experience. Gather your favorite art supplies and create a totally badass, feminist, zine. Check out these awesome favorite zines for some inspiration.
5Enjoy Valentine's Day Treats
Delicious Valentine's Day recipes aren't just for people in relationships! Take this day to brush up on your baking skills and create some yummy, heart shaped treats for you and your friend.
6Throw an Anti-Valentine's Day Party
What better way to spend Valentine's Day then by partying with your friends? Whip up a Valentine's Punch and some delicious cocktails and spend your night celebrating everything that is wonderful about singlehood. Blast your favorite Beyoncé songs and breakup music. As an added bonus, so many pizza restaurants will be having deals on heart-shaped pizzas that you can serve to your guests. You can even call this an "Independence Party."
7Reflect On Your Goals
Last year, I was in utter despair over a breakup with my partner. I was devastated, until my friend gave me a suggestion that ultimately helped me to grow as an individual and as a lover. Upon her advisement, I took out a piece of paper and penned two columns. One column read "F*ck Yes", while the other read "F*ck No." Under each respective column, I wrote down the qualities I wanted most in a romantic partner, while in the other column I wrote down the qualities I would not stand for. Through this exercise in mindfulness, I was able to reflect on my emotional needs, and to visually understand my worth.
7Show Your Appreciation for Your Loved Ones
Valentine's Day is a day for expressing our love and our sentiments. This love is not, as our culture leads us to believe, merely romantic. Take this day to reflect on the people in your life that you treasure and love, whether it be your family, your friends, or a mentor. You can show them your appreciation by gifting them with a handmade card, their favorite food, or by simply giving them a hug and some encouraging words As we know, we all express our love in different ways. During high school and college, my favorite way to celebrate my fellow single girl friends was to send them a candygram.
Truthfully, any way that you choose to outwardly express your love is meaningful and will bring joy and brightness into your day.