When the moment arises, knowing
how to deal with a fight can seem impossible. Should you stand up for yourself and refuse to budge on your position? Should you let the other person "win" just so the two of you can move on? According to experts, neither of these extremes is ideal. But your zodiac sign can help guide you away from whatever your negative tendency is, and toward a strategy that can help you resolve the issue in a healthy, balanced way.
While it's useful to consider your own sign when deciding what to say and do during a fight, make sure you don't forget about your partner,
Emily Ridout, a professional astrologer and yoga teacher, tells Bustle. "When doing this, you may also want to consider your partner’s sign, and how they might like to be treated," she says. For some sun signs, they might need to work on being willing to compromise more while discussing a difficult subject. But for others, their natural tendency is to let the other person "win," and so they should keep in mind that it's important to honor their own thoughts and feelings.
Whatever your sign, approaching the conflict with respect — for yourself and for the other person — is key to
reaching a healthy agreement.
Here is the way you should deal with a fight, based on your zodiac sign.
Aries (March 21 - April 19): Take A Breath
"Aries are the most hot-blooded of the zodiac signs," astrologer
Deniz Kilic, tells Bustle. "They tend to react first and think later." Instead of letting your temper make you say something you might not really mean in the heat of an argument, make sure you're in a good headspace first. "The best way to deal with your partner in a fight is to take in and out a few deep breaths, centering yourself," she says. "Then you can continue with the argument in a more level-headed state."
Taurus (April 20 - May 20): Put Yourself In The Other Person's Shoes
Taurus is known as the most stubborn sun sign, Kilic says, which can create problems when trying to reach a compromise with your partner. Instead of refusing to budge on your point of view, do your best to be open minded. "Be open to your partner's opinions and come to a compromise," she says.
Gemini (May 21 - June 20): Listen Closely
As a Gemini, you are very smart, but don't let this make you assume you already know what the other person
in an argument is going to say, Ridout says. "Keep in mind that what your partner is saying might be about more than simply what’s going on," she says. "To do this, try to listen to what’s going on behind their words. What are the emotions behind what they’re saying? What are your underlying emotions?"
Cancer (June 21 - July 22): Stay Present
In a parallel to their crab sign, Cancers can be tempted to retreat into their shells when faced with conflict. But do your best to fight this urge. "As long as your relationship is truly physically safe, try to stay present and vulnerable with your partner as you tell them how you’re feeling," Ridout says. "Make sure to listen to what they say with an open heart. To do this, connect and stay present though taking deep breaths."
Leo (July 23 - August 22): Be Open To Compromise
"Leos are the royalty of the zodiac, and as such, they don’t like to be contradicted," Ridout says. Make sure not to forget to respect your partner's opinion while fighting, though. "Wise royalty consider opinions that aren’t theirs, so listen closely and consider that you both might be right (or you might even be wrong)," she says. This doesn't mean
never saying what you think is true, of course, but saying it with kindness while understanding that you may not be right 100% of the time.
Virgo (August 23 - September 22): Stop Overanalyzing
Virgos tend to nitpick during a fight and can have an attitude the makes it difficult to reach a respectful resolution,
Lisa Barretta, astrologer and author of tells Bustle. "They sulk and display an arrogant attitude that can last for days," she says. "If Virgo can stop over-analyzing every detail of an argument, the dust will settle in a quicker fashion." Conscious Ink,
Libra (September 23 - October 22): Let Things Rest
As a Libra, you can tend to be passive-aggressive
during a fight, and have a difficult time letting things get to a resolution without starting up the argument again, Barretta says. Instead of coming back to the same fight after you and your partner have come to a resolution, decide to let things rest once they're settled.
Scorpio (October 23 - November 21): Communicate Clearly
Some people will tell you exactly what is making them upset, but Scorpios tend to take a quieter approach. As a Scorpio, your tendency might be to plot and plan your revenge the whole time your partner is arguing with you, Barretta says, but this can be a toxic behavior. Instead of holding in your emotion, say what you're thinking and feeling. "Scorpio needs to communicate what upsets them instead of secretly harboring any resentment," she says.
Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21): Think Before You Speak
"Sagittarius can be very blunt and dreadfully honest
during an argument," Barretta says. "They say whatever comes to mind without thinking how it may further fuel the flames of a fight." While it's good to be honest with your partner, try to think about what you say before you say it. Simply changing the phrasing a little bit could help communicate what you're trying to say without leading to more anger or hurt.
Capricorn (December 22 - January 19): Be Empathetic
For some people, an argument can really get their blood boiling. But for a Capricorn, this can have the opposite effect. "Capricorn can turn icy cold and indifferent during a fight which really makes their partner feel that things have gone too far," Barretta says. "Capricorn can try to be a little more empathetic towards their opponent and not be too severe by prolonging a fair resolution to any differences," she says.
Aquarius (January 20 - February 18): Be Willing To Change Your Mind
As a fixed sign, an Aquarius can automatically believe that they know best, Kilic says. "It's hard for them to change their mind once they are stuck on a belief," she says. Do your best to remain neutral and be willing to reconsider your side once you hear your partner's point of view.
Pisces (February 19 - March 20): Stand Up For Yourself
"Pisces are known as the 'martyrs' of the zodiac," says Kilic. "They sacrifice themselves for the sake of the relationship, and give, give, give." As a Pisces, the best way to
deal with a fight is to be confident about speaking up about what you think and feel. While you might be tempted to just give in to what your partner is saying, it's really important to stand up for your own beliefs and set your own boundaries, she says.
Whatever your tendencies might be during an argument, take a moment to think about how you might approach the conflict in a healthier way. Even a tiny tweak like taking a breath or two has the potential to make a big difference.