Life
No matter what stage your relationship is in, you have worries. During the first couple of dates, you might worry about whether the other person likes you as much as you like them. Once the relationship is official, you may worry about when to meet certain milestones, like moving in together or meeting each other's families. After a while of going strong, you worry about keeping the romance alive in the midst of chores and busy schedules. What you worry about most in a relationship can depend on your zodiac sign, according to an expert, so becoming aware of your biggest concerns can help you address them before they start causing problems.
Whether you're a Taurus who is anxious that you won't be truly understood or you're a Leo who worries about feeling trapped in your relationship, each of these concerns can be helped with clear communication. Be dependable, be honest, and be loyal, Virginia Paciocco, in-house astrologer for Spirit & Spark, tells Bustle. Telling and showing your partner exactly how you're feeling and what specific things they could do to help alleviate your worries and make you feel secure can help your partnership stay strong.
Here is what you are most likely to worry about in a relationship, based on your zodiac sign.
1Aries (March 21 - April 19): Giving More Than You Get
"Aries worries most about giving all their energy away to the other person and not getting it back in return," says Paciocco. Since Aries have more energy than most signs, she says, they have an abundance of energy to give. But sometimes this can make it seem like they're carrying the relationship. If you are an Aries, work on feeling more secure by asking your partner to carve out dedicated time and attention to connect with you whenever they can.
2Taurus (April 20 - May 20): You Won't Be Understood
In a relationship, a Taurus truly wants their values respected. "They will worry that the other person won’t care enough about them to see where they're coming from," Paciocco says. This can be especially frustrating because a Taurus's heart understands the value of people, places, and things. Be vocal about the things you care about most, and don't be afraid to invite your partner to explore them with you, whether that means attending a protest or taking an art class together.
3Gemini (May 21 - June 20): Losing Yourself
As a sign that strives for freedom, you probably consistently worry about getting your freedom taken away from you, says Paciocco. Such an individualistic sign needs to be able to feel that they are able to be themself, even when in a romantic relationship. Don't try to change yourself or push yourself into a role that doesn't fit you just because you think that's what your partner wants. Instead, ask them to respect your individual choices.
4Cancer (June 21 - July 22): Taking Care Of Others
"Cancer feels they are responsible for everything and people will always let them down," says Paciocco. Because Cancers are born with the natural understanding of taking responsibility and what it takes to make someone feel safe, they will always step up and take responsibility, she says. This can feel like a great deal of pressure at times, so make sure that you are asking your partner for help and support when you need it, instead of feeling like you have to shoulder it all alone.
5Leo (July 23 - August 22): Feeling Trapped
If you are a Leo, it's likely that you always give too much of yourself to others, and then feel trapped as a result. "Leo gives abundantly and readily to others with the expectation of loyalty and commitment from the other," says Paciocco. Your generosity is a great trait, but don't let it consume the relationship. Ask your partner to pitch in on their fair share of chores, and take time for yourself whenever you feel like you need it.
6Virgo (August 23 - September 22): Being Able To Trust
"Virgo feels if they let their guard down and trust someone, they will get hurt," Paciocco says. "Also, they tend to be too sensitive to be able to handle negative feedback or criticism." This worry about vulnerability can make it hard for you to connect deeply with a partner, so ask your partner to sit down with you for a deep conversation that is dedicated to talking about your concerns. Having an intentional space to open up can help sharing feel a little less scary.
7Libra (September 23 - October 22): Being Smothered
Paciocco says that a Libra centers around independence and autonomy, and worries most that if you give others what you want, it could stop you from doing what you ultimately want to do, especially with your partner. Even though you love your partner, do your best to draw clear boundaries around when and where you want to share hobbies and friends. If you want to go rock climbing alone or go to dinner with your college roommate without your partner tagging along, say that clearly, and then don't let yourself feel guilty.
8Scorpio (October 23 - November 21): Being Lied To
"Scorpio worries if they fully trust someone they will later betray or abandon them," says Paciocco. As a Scorpio, you are probably deep in your private thoughts at all times, and aren't quick to share them. If you aren't being open with your partner, it's unlikely that they will be totally candid with you, so hold yourself to the same qualities of honesty and sharing that you expect from them. This will help set a standard of the type of communication the two of you expect in your relationship, rather than leaving room for ambiguity and suspicion.
9Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21): Your Partner Might Leave
Paciocco says that a Sagittarius is most likely to worry that if they don’t spend enough time with their partner, they will lose control and their partner may leave. "Sagittarius is so openminded and free to travel and explore that they can easily get distracted," she says, so as a Sagittarius, invite your partner on excursions with you whenever you get a chance. These adventures will help the two of you bond, and help you feel secure. Whether that means having date night in a new part of town or booking a trip to the other side of the world together, you'll be closer as a result.
10Capricorn (December 22 - January 19): Losing Control
"Capricorn worries that if they take a risk or make a scene they will not be safe in the relationship," says Paciocco. "It's not safe for them to be spontaneous or lose control." To you as a Capricorn, consistency and predictability feel safe, and a tumultuous relationship is not what you're looking for. Tell your partner that you're having trouble letting loose, and then walk through how they would react to certain scenarios. For example, if you were to get very drunk at a party, how would they react? Talking through what taking a risk would look like could help you feel more secure.
11Aquarius (January 20 - February 18): You'll Never Be Truly Loved
For an Aquarius, the worry that you will not feel special or truly equal with your partner in a relationship is a big one. Paciocco says that Aquarius people love themselves to their core, and know that no one can really be like them. Instead of trying to convince yourself that you're "normal," embrace your uniqueness by being exactly yourself with your partner. To make you feel even more comfortable, explore all of your partner's little quirks, and then celebrate them together.
12Pisces (February 19 - March 20): Everything Being Perfect
"Pisces worries that things should always be in order, and that there is a right way of doing things," says Paciocco. "They stress that their partner won’t do things properly." A Pisces's natural inclination is to focus on the negative rather than the positive, so be sure to stay in the moment and appreciate all of the good things around you. Instead of griping about the fact that your partner didn't follow your system for loading the dishwasher, thank them for the time they took to do the chore.
No matter what worries plague you in your relationship, the best thing you can do is to be clear about your concerns. Your partner doesn't love you despite your little quirks, but because they make you exactly who you are.
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