"Clear Coding" Is All About Being Radically Honest On First Dates

It takes some guts to talk about the future on a first date. Traditionally, you’re supposed to make lighthearted jokes and chat about favorite colors, not five-year plans. But when you think about it, this tactic rarely leads anywhere good — cut to five months after date one when you’re stuck in a situationship.

It’s why people are leaning into “clear coding,” a trend uncovered by Tinder in its Year in Swipe™ 2025 report. The dating app found that 64% of young singles want more emotional honesty in their dating life, while 60% crave clearer communication around intentions.

Clear coding is all about stating exactly what you’re looking for in a relationship, whether it’s a fling or a serious connection. That way, you get to bypass confusion, mixed messages, hurt feelings, and those post-date “decoding sessions” with friends.

It’s a phrase you might have already heard, since folks are chatting about clear coding on social media, too. In a Reddit post, one user said, “Being up front will not scare off someone who wants what you want.” Another wrote, “Being honest and no BS? Sign me up.” Here’s what to know about clear coding, according to a relationship expert.

What Is Clear Coding In Dating?

According to Devyn Simone, Tinder’s resident relationship expert, clear coding aims to make dating less of a guessing game. “For years, ‘playing it cool’ was almost considered a dating strategy. People worried that being too honest too soon would scare someone away,” she tells Bustle. “Now it rewards being self-aware.”

Instead of being mysterious or “waiting to see what happens,” you would go into a date knowing exactly what you want — and you wouldn’t be afraid to say it. “That kind of clarity feels refreshing,” she says. “When no one has to decode the subtext, there’s more space for connection to actually breathe.”

Being aloof may seem hot, but it actually causes so much drama. “It leads to overthinking, mixed signals, and situationships that linger longer than they should,” Simone says. “Clear coding flips that dynamic. It encourages people to express interest while also being transparent about their long-term intentions.”

“Emotional honesty actually accelerates compatibility, it doesn’t sabotage it.”

According to Tinder, 73% of young single says they fall for people who allow them to be themselves, and clear coding plays into that, too. “You can’t be yourself if you’re constantly filtering or downplaying your needs,” Simon says. “Emotional honesty actually accelerates compatibility, it doesn’t sabotage it.”

The biggest perk, however, is avoiding mixed signals and the dreaded relationship limbo. “When no one defines the connection, people can stay in gray areas for months, unsure where they stand, hesitant to ask, afraid to disrupt the dynamic,” she says. “Clear coding reduces that ambiguity early on. If both people are upfront about what they want, it becomes much easier to determine alignment.”

How To Practice Clear Coding

To practice clear coding, start with your dating bio. If you’re direct in your profile about what you want and what you’re looking for, Simone says you should have more intentional conversations right from the start.

“For example, one might include a line like ‘big on equality and kindness’ in their profile, or use pictures of themselves volunteering or with family to show what’s close to their heart and how they prioritize relationships,” she says. That should weed out people who don’t share your values, and give people an idea of who they’re about to join for drinks.

Once you have a date lined up, consult your friends, call your mom, or scribble in your journal to get clear on what you want from your new connection. Then, take a deep breath and let it be known. “Clear coding doesn’t mean oversharing your five-year plan over appetizers,” she says. “It’s about being honest without being intense.”

Simon recommends weaving your needs into the conversation as naturally as possible. When the bread basket comes, mention that you’re at a point in life where you’d really like to be in a long-term relationship. Twenty minutes later, mention that you only fall for people who are open emotionally.

The Bottom Line

Still scared about opening up on a first date? Remember this: The right partner won’t be intimidated by your wants and needs. They’ll actually be relieved by it.

“Honesty acts as a filter,” Simone says. “It may not resonate with everyone, but that’s the point. Clear coding isn’t about appealing to the widest audience; it’s about connecting with the most aligned one. Trust is the foundation of any relationship worth pursuing.”

Clear coding is also a mindset shift. It isn’t about seeking approval at all costs, but about evaluating compatibility. “It shifts the focus from trying to be chosen to choosing wisely,” she says. “When expectations are clear, connection feels possible instead of complicated. And that emotional confidence is becoming one of the most attractive qualities in dating today.”

Source:

Devyn Simone, Tinder’s resident relationship expert