Sex

How To Use A Butt Plug For The First Time

During solo or partnered sex.

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Butt plugs are genderless sex toys that can help you switch up your bedroom routine, whether you’re a butt-play beginner or an anal pro. According to sex toy expert for retailer Love Honey Ashley Cobb, butt plugs are incredibly versatile and can stimulate the prostate (or P-spot), G-spot, or clitoris. These toys can provide a sense of fullness, apply internal pressure, and stimulate the nerves in the anal canal. “Butt plugs are a great tool to help relax the sphincter muscles and prepare the body for anal play, especially if penetration is the end goal,” Alicia Sinclair, CEO and of anal play product brand b-Vibe, tells Bustle. Even if penetration or orgasm isn’t your ultimate goal, plugging your butt during masturbation, partnered sex, or to rock throughout the day (if you’re into that) can be super pleasurable.

How To Pick Your First Butt Plug

First things first, proceed with caution. “The anus is an extremely sensitive part of your body,” says Cobb. You need a butt plug that’s body-safe and easy to clean. “Certain materials like soft plastic, rubber, or jelly feel more realistic, but they can’t be sterilized properly, and they hold odor, too.” Butt plugs made of silicone and metal can be sterilized either in the dishwasher or boiling water (as long as it doesn’t vibrate). Her rule of thumb? If you can’t sterilize it, don’t buy it. Oh, and be sure to buy anal plugs with flared bases – otherwise, they’ll get lost.

According to Sinclair, plugs come in many different materials with different types of functions (think: vibrating, weighted, rimming, silicone, stainless steel, and glass butt plugs.) Brand new to the world of anal play? Start slow, small, and slim, or try an anal training kit specifically for beginners. If it’s your first time buying a plug, she recommends starting with a body-safe silicone plug about the size of your pointer finger. “If you’ve already been playing with a finger, you want to select a plug that’s about the size of two fingers,” she adds. “Just like all things in life, it will take a little experimentation to find what you personally enjoy.” Plus, you can always size up. Consider trying Satisfyer’s Booty Call, They-ology’s anal training set, or Tracey Cox’s tapered vibrating plug.

Ways To Use Butt Plugs During Sex

Plugs can be enjoyed during solo and partnered sex. “The simple addition of a plug in your body while masturbating can be pretty thrilling,” says Sinclair. “The added pressure and sensation often gives folks an even more intense orgasm.” To add even more sensation, you can try a vibrating plug.

Partnered plugs can be fun, too. “You secretly could put a plug in an hour before sex and tell your partner once it’s in that there’s some butt play on the sexual horizon to tease them beforehand,” she says. “If you use a product with a remote control, one partner could wear the plug while the other controls the intensity and vibration pattern.” You and your partner can both wear plugs during sex, and you can also make inserting the plugs part of foreplay. Don’t be afraid to experiment — play around with plugs in different ways and see what excites you and feels best.

Butt Plug Safety & Aftercare

Before you begin booty play, know the non-negotiables. Always use lube, then add more lube. “The butt is not self-lubricating (like the vagina), and you will most likely experience a sensation like a rug burn if you skip the lube,” says Sinclair. So, lube and repeat.

Never insert a plug straight into your sphincter, either. “Point the tip of the plug at a 45-degree angle towards the belly button and gently insert,” she says. “You may also want to try slightly bearing down, which will help open the sphincter and allow for easier entry.” If at any point you start to feel pain, stop ASAP. “Sometimes, our bodies aren’t in the mood, and that’s OK.” If something doesn’t feel good, back off and try another time.

Cobb also reminds you that you need to wash your plugs immediately after use with a toy cleaner or soap and hot water. Oh, and never go from hole to hole with the plug without cleaning it first. “The anus contains specific bacteria – unique to its ecosystem – that shouldn't be shared with other orifices or surfaces,” adds Sinclair. Ignoring this vital step can quickly lead to infection.

Post-Anal Play

Provide anal sex aftercare for yourself and/or your partner by verbally checking in to make sure they’re okay, praising them for what you enjoyed during the experience, and taking care of that tush. “Anal tissues are delicate, and it's normal for them to be a little sore after sex,” Sinclair reminds. “Gentle baby wipes can easily clean up, while an Epsom salt bath can feel purifying, pampering, and practical for sore muscles.”

Ultimately, Sinclair says that anal sex aftercare doesn't need to be grand or overly sentimental – it just needs to be an intentional display of appreciation and responsibility. “Whatever you do, follow our general aftercare rule that the higher you fly, the softer you should pad the landing.”

Experts:

Ashley Cobb, sex toy expert for retailer Love Honey

Alicia Sinclair, CEO and of anal play product brand b-Vibe