And You Thought There'd Be No '14 Christmas Kard!

I don't want a lot for Christmas. There is just one thing I need. I don't care about the presents underneath the Christmas tree. I just want... a new Kardashian Christmas card! (You probably weren't expecting that twist on Mariah Carey's lyrics, huh?) But sadly, we can't always get what we want. Breaking hearts across America (or maybe just mine), the famous family announced they're not continuing their tradition of outrageous holiday cards this year. So disappointing! Apparently they ran out of time. Kim Kardashian said there's no Christmas card, but they're throwing a holiday party instead. In an interview with Glamour U.K., she explained,

I think this is the first year that we're not doing our card, but...at our Christmas party we have this amazing photo booth so we're going to do like a compilation and do a New Year's card... So that's kind of what we came up with, but we're kind of sad, we just couldn't get it together. And where is everyone? Y'know, this one doesn't want to be in it, this one does want to be in it, so who knows.

But why wouldn't someone want to be in a forced family photo? I simply don't understand. Although my guess of who didn't want to join in rhymes with Kob Rardashian. Anyway, instead of waiting around for a "New Year's card" that may never come, I've decided to take matters into my own hands and create my own version of the Kardashian Khristmas Kard. Feel free to print it out and give to everyone you know. That's what I'll be doing.

Since you'll probably have to zoom in for the full effect, here's a recap of what's included in the shot.

First, it's set in Kim's mansion from none other than Kim Kardashian: Hollywood . Because if there's one thing that defined this year, it was her iPhone game that earned millions. The fam also chose to stick just to the kids, no adults. (Sorry, Kris!) Luckily, Kim's walls are adorned with photos of all of her loved ones.

Part 1: The Kardashian-West Crew

  • Little Nori was a bit camera shy, hence her turning away.
  • See what's hanging on the wall? A nice shot of Kris Jenner and Kim from the iPhone game.
  • Kim really loved her dress from the GQ Awards, so she chose to re-wear it for the holiday photo.
  • Sadly, we couldn't get a smile out of Kanye for the picture. But that doesn't mean he's not happy to be there — I'm sure he was!

Part 2: Scott, Kourtney, & Khloe

  • An old family photo adorns the wall from back when they still took group photos together.
  • Yup, that's a blown-up image of Kim completing the Ice Bucket Challenge on the Ellen Show. Hey, if Ellen Degeneres spoofed Kim's Paper cover for her Christmas card, she had to be included in Kim's!
  • Meanwhile, Scott's wearing a jacket with lions on it, while Kourtney and Khloe look fierce posing in chairs.
  • Oh, and did you catch the North West photo hiding in the wreath?

Part 3: Kendall, Kylie, & the Disick Kids

  • Rob probably didn't want to participate, but that doesn't mean he's not still included somehow.
  • Same goes for Bruce Jenner! One of his old Olympic shots is on the wall. It's better than being trapped on the side, like last year.
  • Kendall and Kylie are casually posing, as they try to avoid getting run over by Penelope and Mason Disick on their tricycle. I'm not sure who let them ride the bike in the house!
  • Yes, your eyes aren't deceiving you. That's that wall of popcorn — I mean roses — that Kanye gave Kim for Mother's Day in the background.

So there you have it: the latest (and greatest) Kardashian Christmas card... or at least Bustle's version anyway!

Images: Kim Kardashian, Scott Disick, Kourtney Kardashian, Kylie Jenner, Kris Jenner/Instagram; Getty Images; E!; Jamie Primeau/Bustle