Bustle Newsletter: May 16, 2022

On sex fantasy fallacies, Vanessa Bayer's new show, and more.

by Stephanie Talmadge
James Devaney/GC Images/Getty Images
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A version of this content appeared in Bustle’s daily newsletter on May 16, 2022. If you like what you see, sign up to receive it in your inbox right here.

Is My Sex Fantasy Normal?

“Whatever you can imagine, someone else has imagined it before you,” says Cyndi Darnell, a New York-based sex therapist, and also Rule 34. So the short answer is: Yes, yes, yes, and yes, your fantasy is normal. Darnell also says we shouldn’t read too much into them, either. “Sometimes people like to analyze fantasies in the same way we might analyze our sleep dreams. If people say, ‘Gosh I fantasize about going to Paris,’ nobody ever says, ‘That’s because you were abused as a child.’ No, you just want to go to Paris,” she adds. “But we’ve decided that sex fantasies are these extra risky things. And there’s frankly no difference between imagining having an orgy and having lunch in Paris. It doesn’t mean anything other than the meaning you place on it.” Read More

The Latest

This TikToker Has Genius Advice For Boosting Your Dating Confidence

And it’s not having a glass of wine while you get ready, although in my experience, that works in a pinch. Thanks to her hilarious takedowns of misogynistic videos on the platform, Drew Afualo, a 26-year-old from California, has quickly amassed over 7 million followers and is getting ready to launch a new podcast, too. She chatted with Bustle about her best tips for building self-confidence, dealing with body image issues, and her fave pre-date pump-up songs. Read More

Kourtney And Travis Are ~Officially~ Married

The couple was spotted outside of a Santa Barbara courthouse over the weekend and are believed to be legally married now, which they needed to do ahead of their big celebration happening in Italy “very soon.” Congrats to the happy couple, can’t wait to see what I’m sure will be very PDA-heavy pics. Read More

This Recipe Is #PastaTok’s Latest Obsession

There was the baked feta pasta craze of 2021 and the goat cheese rendition that came afterward, but this grown-up take on one of your childhood faves is the platform’s noodle recipe du jour. Read More

Must Reads

14 Spicy Bralette Outfits For Vaxxed Girl Summer, Round 2

Thongs have become accessories, underboob bikinis are trending, and there’s a bustier dress on virtually every red carpet. It’s safe to say that underwear is now, officially, outerwear. Now, just in time for the real Hot Vaxxed Summer (I think we can all agree, last year didn’t really count), bras are getting the same treatment. Read More

At 14, Vanessa Bayer Was Bad At Sports & Lusting Over Jared Leto

Like most of us, the Emmy-nominated SNL star was religiously watching My So-Called Life, Melrose Place, and Saved by the Bell. Unlike most of us, however, Bayer was handed a leukemia diagnosis at 15, which she battled through high school. Her new Showtime series, I Love That for You, is loosely based on her experience as a young cancer patient who uses own humor as a coping mechanism. She sat down with Bustle to talk about the show, her adolescent obsession with QVC, and her unabashed love of attention. Read More


Here’s Your Daily Horoscope

Find the silver lining. Read More

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